Family Video

For Christmas this year, my Aunt Connie made a DVD for everyone in my family that included a video made of both my Grandma Rose and Grandpa Dave (who died this past June) in 1992. In the video, both are describing what they know of their family history, and their childhood memories. It also includes a video from 1999 of Dave describing his experiences in WWII, and on D-Day. It is such a treasure to have these, and I am so thankful that Connie had the foresight to take them.

I watched the video last Tuesday, right after our family Christmas party. I fully expected the video of my Grandpa to make me sad, and it did. Not just because he passed away so recently, but really because I felt that we lost him so much longer ago to Alzheimers. I don't think I had a conversation with him where he was fully present mentally past 2003. It was lovely to hear him and see him the way I remember him.

What I didn't expect was that the video of my Grandma Rose would hit me even harder. My Grandma is still with us, and she is sharp as a tack mentally. But as she has aged, she is much feebler physically, and her mental outlook is so pessimistic. She thinks and talks mostly about her health, and truly that is understandable considering the amount of medical issues that she has. She doesn't like to leave the house, and it is hard to have a conversation with her sometimes, and she has started to shut people out because she is so depressed.

Seeing her in the video from 18 years ago brought me to instant tears. There was the Grandma I remembered, laughing and telling stories. Looking lively and sitting in the kitchen I loved to be in. It felt like sitting across the kitchen table from her as she used to be. Again, I am so thankful to have this on tape, but it made it painfully obvious how much ground she has lost lately.

Time can be an ugly thing. There are so many times when I wish I could stop it entirely. But since I can't, I will use this as one more reminder to savor moments as much as I can.