Back in the Saddle Again

Until last night, our family had only been to church with all members present once. We tried at Christmas Eve Mass 2007, when Sam was just a little over a year old. It did not go well. Charlie spent most of church with Jeff in my classroom, and Sammy and I hung out in the foyer. Luckily Evan was in the choir, because nobody was left in the pew.

Charlie has been going to church regularly since he was about 20 months old. Despite being my kiddo who throws a world class tantrum, he has always had a great command of "the whisper voice" (a must for church going children) and he's always done very well sitting still and entertaining himself during the service.

Sammy, who is in most other situations very calm and well mannered, goes nuts as soon as you put him in a church situation. He has one voice level, and it is nowhere near a whisper.

We thought we'd throw caution to the wind last night though, and we all went to the less formal Saturday night service. True to form, about 25 minutes in, Sammy was talking loudly, trying to run from the row we were sitting in, and was trying to steal colors from the children in front of us. I took Sammy back out to the van where we had a "come to Jesus meeting". He was enraged about not being included on something Charlie and Evan were doing, so I took him back in for one more try. Luckily, he let me hold him for the rest of the service, and he didn't say another word.

Even though it was interrupted, it was so nice for us all to go to church together again. It's been so long!! I didn't realize just how much I'd missed it until last night.

New Do

I spent a chunk of my Saturday with my uber talented hair stylist Katie, who worked magic on my hair. I have been working so hard on my physical health and appearance lately, I thought that it might inspire me further to get out of my mommy doldrums to spice up my hair and put a little pizazz in my appearance.

So, I did something I have never done before...I turned blond!!!! After all, blonds have more fun right?! Here is a close up of the color:



And the total effect:



Please be a good friend and ignore the pile of laundry in the background. It's hard to frame a photo you are taking of yourself, no?

I feel so spicy now!!! I am so glad I made a change. Let's hope my stomach muscles follow suit.

Shredding in Prrogress

I've just finished Day Two of Shredding with Jillian Michaels. Yesterday, I started with the Level 1 workout. Afterwards, I felt like I had put in a good workout, and my muscles felt warm, and a bit shaky. But this morning, I didn't feel a thing! I was expecting, even looking forward to, being sore. There is something a bit rewarding in a weirdo way about feeling it the next morning. Let's you know you did something! So I was disappointed. But after I thought about it, not being sore made me feel good about my past 15 months of exercise. Although I didn't see a ton of weight loss, it turns out I got into better physical shape.

So tonight I threw caution to the wind and did the Level 2 workout even though it was only my second day. I definitely feel like it was more my speed, and I worked harder.

I love that the workouts are only 20 minutes long. It's hard to fit exercise into a busy mom's schedule, but these are great. Hard, but quick, and hopefully effective.

Here's to shredding off my 10 pound goal!

Weigh In Wednesday

Today was a depressing weigh in at The Sole Woman.

I gained 1.5 pounds, which I fully attribute to the stupid rabbit who goes around leaving four large baskets of candy on my kitchen counter to tempt me all day long. I didn't gorge or anything, but I did munch on some chocolate here and there. Apparently enough to gain a pound and a half.

I am really bummed because I was SUPER good at Easter dinner, where I only ate salad and a small bit of turkey.

As for Shredding, I must have chose the option "Please deliver by Pony Express" at Amazon, because I just received my DVD late yesterday afternoon, after I had already worked out for the day. So today will be my first day of shredding, and I am really hoping it will take off that extra pound and more.

Totals:
Last week: 175.8
This week: 177.3

Blech. Here's to a clean slate this week and NO MORE CHOCOLATE!

Lazy Blogger

I realized this morning it has been three days since I posted, which is mostly due to the whirlwind of the holiday and the amount of errands I tried to pack into our time off from school.

Charlie was evaluated by the public schools for speech yesterday. My big concern is stuttering, which is getting worse everyday. He wowed the ladies by telling them his colors in spanish, with the length of his sentences, and with the complexity of concepts that he was able to converse with them about. Which nixed him for the special ed preschool where speech therapy takes place. However, they said to keep an eye on the stuttering since there is a family history, and to call them back in 6 months. I guess you can't qualify for services for stuttering until you are a late three, which Charlie is not. It was nice to have an outside opinion on how he is developing cognitively, which I have been watching like a hawk after everything with Evan. They said he was above average in all areas, which is a relief.

Charlie also had his first trip to the dentist late yesterday afternoon. He went back all by himself, did exactly as he was told, and allowed them to polish his teeth and apply a flouride treatment. He proudly came back to the waiting room carrying a new Lightning McQueen toothbrush and proclaiming how proud his Daddy would be since he was so good. Sometimes I look at this newly independent child, who will calmly follow directions, and I thank God from the bottom of my soul that he is past the terrible twos.

Evan is gone camping Monday and Tuesday with the guys of the family, including my Dad, and I have been feeling like my right arm is missing. I miss that kid down to my bones. I'll never be able to send him off to college.

My favorite part of Easter was singing in the Easter choir. I love music. I love to sing, and I love to play an instrument as part of a group. In high school I was in choir, and glee club, band, and marching band. I love performing, and I love making music just for the pure joy of it. I miss it. A lot. And so, being able to lift my voice with others at church was a pure joy, especially since it was on Easter. Unfortunately, our pastor hasn't yet given the go ahead for our choir to be year round (our church is a new parish, and we are still operating out of an elementary school so some things are not yet established) so I am out of my music fix now that Easter is over.

I got a lot of piddly stuff done like getting the toddlers some new summer pjs and shoes, grocery shopping, and above all, a lot of napping. I don't know what is wrong with me lately but I could sleep for days. Literally. It is a struggle to get out of bed each morning, and by 12:30 I am ready for a nap. Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and Monday all involved three hour naps. And I could have slept longer but the toddlers woke up. I am starting to feel like I should go to the doctor.

I am longing for summer. Only 26 more school days until I can take up napping on a permanent basis.

A Piece of Cuteness

I took this picture this morning of my adorable toddlers...



Aren't they delicious?!

Meet the Clampetts

About 6 weeks ago, our next door neighbors moved out, and a family they had rented their house to moved in. Frank, our original neighbor, was nice enough. We did have the occasional wordless argument about where our front yard boundaries were, which we tried to establish by mowing over on the other person's side a bit. But it was all a friendly battle. They were a friendly family who pulled Jeff's car out of a snow bank once, and took care of their home and yard.

Unfortunately, in an effort to move in a hurry, Frank found Larry to lease his house to. We not very affectionately refer to Larry, his wife, pack of 5 rowdy kids, and their two hound dogs as the Clampetts. Here is why:



This is what their backyard looks like. It is also now the view out my bedroom window. Notice the 2x4s balanced on the fence for no apparent reason. The large piles of dog crap everywhere (yesterday was somewhat warm here, and let me tell you-the smell was not pretty). The old carpet mounded up in the lower corner. The trash spread around. The screen door which they have removed for some reason and which is now sitting against the wall. It's nothing short of disgusting. Their front porch serves as a collection site for old computer parts, the shells of computer towers, old muddy shoes, and rusting lawn furniture.

My only consolation is that they are renters. I hope they have a short lease. Can you imagine putting your house on the market and having to show it with these people next door? I hope they are gone before we have to do exactly that.

Weigh In Wednesday

It is week 2 of my Shrinking Jeans challenge, and time for my second weekly weigh in. Here are my results:

Start Weight: 180
Last Week's Weight: 177.9
Today's Weight: 175.8

This means I lost another 2.1 pounds this week, for a total of 4.2 pounds! I am speechless. Not only because the number 4 is really exciting, but also because I cheated! I had a donut for breakfast on Sunday, and a brownie on Monday. This next week I am going to really try and NOT cheat, and see if that can kick things up a notch.

My goal this week was to drink lots more water than I usually do. I am totally addicted to diet pop! A good friend suggested that whenever I get the urge for pop that I drink a glass of water first, and then if I was still thirsty I could drink the pop. This was an awesome idea, as more often than not I didn't want to drink anything else after the water. I also noticed I didn't want to snack quite as much when I was careful to get my water intake for the day.

Next week my goal is to start something called "shredding". Shredding is an exercise program on DVD by Jillian Michaels that many of the bloggers over at the Sisterhood of the Shrinking Jeans have been talking about. You do a segment of the video for 20 minutes a day for 30 days, and supposedly it will make a big change in how you look and feel. Not sure why it is called shredding (what will I be shredding? Muscles? Patience?) as I think the name is scary, and maybe a little overwhelming. Perhaps "Shedding" would be better? As in shedding pounds? Whatever it is, after Beth's rave reviews at I Should Be Folding Laundry, I am ready to try it. I ordered the DVD last night from Amazon.com, and it was only $11, with S&H. Another positive! I guess even if it turns out to not work, at least I only spent $11. As soon as it arrives, I will begin shredding my weight loss!

Hopefully it will help another two pounds to disappear this coming week!

Duh

Over the weekend, Jeff was playing around with my new cell phone (It's pink! I love it!) trying to figure out some of the new features. Somehow, without me knowing, he changed the sounds and settings that occur when you get a text message or an email.

Fast forward to Monday morning. I keep my purse in a locked desk drawer at school, that happens to be directly underneath my computer. All throughout the day I kept hearing these beeps and tweets. I could NOT figure out where it was coming from. At first I thought it was the computer, but then it kept happening after I turned the computer off. I hunted all through my desk for a stopwatch or something else that could be tweeting like a bird.

Finally, in desperation, I began to talk to myself. "What in the WORLD is that dumb noise?!"

All 30 of my students turned to me with derision dripping from their eyes and voices, and said almost all in unison "It's your PHONE Mrs. Kleffman. You are getting a TEXT. DUH."

Oh. Right. I knew that.

How do I know that my 4th grader is studying electricity in science class?

Because today when Evan caught Sammy plugging and unplugging an air freshener into an outlet he told him, "Sam, you really shouldn't do that. You are a conductor for electricity. Not an insulator!"

Can I Still Think on My Feet?

I just spent the last hour preparing for my upcoming testing session for my NBPTS certification. They have an online tutorial that you can do ahead of time to prepare you for the format of the test, which is on computer. Unfortunately, it doesn't give you any sample questions.

There are several sections to the test, in which they apparently give you situational essay questions to answer, with a 30 minute time limit for each section.

I never felt nervous taking standardized tests in high school or college. I felt secure in my ability to take tests and to remain calm during testing. I usually passed the first time around with a score I was happy with.

It's been so long since I have had to do anything like this though, that the closer it gets, the more nervous I become. Do I still have what it takes? What if I have no idea how to answer one of the questions? I am a little nervous taking this as a private school teacher. Because we don't have the funds available to public schools, I don't get to go to a lot of continuing education inservices or opportunities like I did when I taught for the public schools. I don't feel like I am on the cutting edge of the education field anymore. I am terrified I will get asked about something I haven't been exposed to because of where I teach. Can I still bullshit my way through an essay?

I wish I could somehow snatch up my 20 year old self and transport her to the testing center on April 25th. I'd feel a lot better if she were taking the test.

I am BONE TIRED.

This was the week from heck. Two nights this week I had to go back to school for evening activities. I hate not getting to spend the evening with my family. I know it's part of the job, but sometimes I feel like as a teacher people expect me to be available all the time, and that my classroom should come before my own family. Argh.

My students had their music program at school this week, which was adorable. They did a GREAT job. But, it mean that we had three different performances during the school day, so our schedule was totally screwed up. When you mess with the structure of a 6 year old's day, it causes kids with TOO MUCH ENERGY. Which mean their teacher has NO ENERGY.

We have tons of end of the year (only 29 days to go!!!) deadlines looming and no time to accomplish everything in.

So. I'm pooped. I am looking forward to a weekend with my kids, hubby, and my couch. And my bed and sleep. And that's it. The end.

Weigh In Wednesday

Today is my first weekly weigh in for my Shrinking Into Summer Challenge with the Sisterhood of the Shrinking Jeans. I am REALLY excited to announce my numbers. Here goes:

Start Weight: 180
Week One Weigh In Weight: 177.9
Total Loss: 2.1 pounds!!!!

The Good: I met my exercise goal for the week. I exercised 4 out of the 7 days of the week. I am really proud of myself for this, because it was hard to be consistent after my month long exercise hiatus. Several nights I was very tired and SOOOOO tempted to go to bed early instead. But I didn't. I am also loving my water pilates class. Some great toning is going on with this!

Remember those pants that were tight? They still aren't back to normal, but definitely feeling looser.

The Bad: Eating healthy while cooking for your family is hard. Especially when your husband is really picky. I try to use very healthy cooking methods, but some of the things I serve because they are easy/quick and cheap (like tater tots) are probably stuff I shouldn't eat. I am going to try and substitute a salad for myself on these days.

The Ugly: It was my brother's birthday on Sunday, and I ate a piece of peach pie with whipped cream on top. And yesterday? I ate an M & Ms monster cookie. Argh. I felt SO guilty afterwards. On the other hand, when I totally deny myself foods, I tend to binge later. So I am going to try and just move on, and focus on my two pounds that ARE GONE!

My goal for this week is to up the exercise to 5 days. I can't "weight" to see if it helps!

With My Feet Firmly Planted On the Ground

Jeff is scheduled to take a business trip in June to California. This is the first trip ever that he has been able to schedule during the summer, the only time when I am available to go with him. The best part of being a teacher is having summers off. But the worst part is also having summers off, because your principal always expects everything in your life to then happen in the summer, and GOD BLESS AMERICA do NOT ask for time off during the school year.

But now that I actually have the opportunity to go with him, vegitate in a hotel room without kids, lounge by a pool and drink diet Coke and read books to my hearts content, I don't know if I can make myself go.

I have always had a hard time leaving the kids to go on vacation. Although I need a break sometimes just like every mother, I miss the kids SO much when I am gone that I have a hard time relaxing and enjoying myself. When Jeff and I travel on the same plane, I am an absolute wreck. I have a fear of flying, but it's worse when we are together. I can't help imagining what would happen to the kids if something happened to both of us.

So I probably won't go. Which is so neurotic, and yes I probably need to get over it. But I just don't think I can talk myself into it.

Whirlwind

I am reading a book with Evan right now that was my all time favorite book in elementary school. It's called Night of the Twisters, by Ivy Ruckman. It is a semi-fictionalized account of the 1980 tornadoes that hit Grand Island, Nebraska. 7 tornadoes destroyed the town on June 3, 1980 over a time span of roughly three hours. The storm is qualified as the most unusual tornado outbreak in the United States, as it was an extremely slow moving storm (roughly 8 miles per hour), it spawned a large number of tornadoes which all followed a curved path that often turned back on itself instead of the traditional straight line, and three of the tornadoes were anticyclonic (which means that they turned clockwise). Only 1% of tornadoes in the Northern Hemisphere turn clockwise, and to have three in one storm is incredible.

I originally picked up the book at age 8 because the author Ivy Ruckman came and made a presentation at my school, where she told about her grandchidren who had ridden out the storm in their basement. While reading, my mom told me that my Aunt Denise had been in Grand Island the night of the storm, and for several days they knew nothing of her whereabouts or safety, which added a personal connection for me.

The whole experience began a lifelong fascination for me. I just love to study, read, and hear about tornadoes. I get a bit nervous during an actual storm, especially now that I am a mother. As I head to the basement, I can't help thinking about how exactly I would keep all three of my babies from swirling away from me. But the absolute fascination is still there, just as much as when I was 8.

And so, as we head into another tornado season here in Tornado Alley, I can't help but be excited. There's just something about the sky turning green that gets the blood moving, you know?

An Open Letter to the Lady Responsible for My Latest Obsession

Dear Stephenie Meyer,

I love your Twilight series. I don't know what it is about your characters, but they have grabbed me like no other. I love them like I knew them in real life.

But now I have a problem. Now that I am done with the series (several times over if truth be told), I am left with a craving for more. AND THERE IS NO MORE!!! And I can't stand that fact. I imagine that this may be how a heroine addict might feel if told there was no more to be had.

I have watched the movie ten times since it came out on DVD last Saturday, much to the chagrin of my family.

So please! Take pity on me! Write us another installment. Maybe what happens to Renesmee and Jacob? Just a suggestion!

Withering in Nebraska,
Christy-Your Most Loyal Fan

Three Random Things I am Grateful For

1. My husband. He is so patient with me. I don't deserve it, or him, but thank you God for sending him my way.

2. My boys. I wasn't sure I would be able to have more children after Evan. Charlie and Sammy were some of the biggest, yet best surprises of my life. At first I wanted them to be pink, but I love the three blues I got.

3. My mission. I am so thankful that I have been given the gift/privilege of teaching. I don't just think of it as a career or a job. I've always thought of it as my vocation. I know deep down it is what God wants me to do. I have know it deep down since I was five years old. I am thankful to have been centered in this way my entire life.

Hail Storm

I suppose this could be considered old news, as it happened on Monday, but it was also big news for the boys at our house, so I'll post it anyway.

Even thought it is only March, we had our first round of tornado weather here in Omaha on Monday. Interestingly, on the same date in 1913, there was a huge tornado that ravaged parts of Omaha. People that live here in the Cornhusker state know that any type of weather can happen any time. Sometimes stressful, but I would take a tornado over an earthquake any day.

Monday afternoon about 4:30, the sky outside our deck door started to turn a sickly shade of green. My "mommy storm radar" went on full alert, and I sent the kids downstairs to play. I just had a feeling the sirens were going to go off at some point, and I thought this would make the kids easier to round up. I also started carting pairs of tennis shoes downstairs. My grandmother and mother have told me endless times not to go into the basement for a tornado without shoes for everyone, in case you have to walk back out over glass and rubble. I just can't hit the basement without shoes.

Sure enough, around 5:00 my weather radio was alarming and the sirens were blaring. 5 minutes later, despite being contained in a windowless basement room, we could hear hail absolutely POUNDING the house. The storm's funnel/wall cloud passed about 15 blocks south of our house, which explains the horrific winds we heard hurling hail at our siding. Once we were sure the storm had passed our area of the city, I ventured out to a window, and discovered so much hail in our yard it looked like it had snowed. Here is the view on our deck of a pile that collected near the baby gate:



I thought the fun was over, and the sky actually did start getting a bit sunny for about 15 minutes, but soon we were back to green, and this time we had rain, more hail, and 70 mile an hour winds. The wind picked up all of our lawn furniture at once, and hurled it over our 6 foot privacy fence into the neighbor's yard. Sammy, who was looking out the window with me, remarked, "Oh lookie! It can fly!"

This went on for about 10 minutes. When it finally stopped, I thought we were done yet again. Just like before, the sun came out a bit, but within 15 minutes the rain, wind, and hail were all back. More hail joining the previous pile:



Luckily for us, round three was it. I zipped outside between raindrops to gather some hailstones for the boys to explore and keep in the freezer.



Charlie was surprised to discover that ice cubes could fall from the sky.

It was an exciting afternoon, but not one that I want to repeat soon!!!!

I am Going to Be SHRINKING!

Some of my favorite bloggers started an online weight loss community called The Sisterhood of the Shrinking Jeans awhile ago. I have been watching from afar as they lost some serious pounds. I have always wanted to join one of their challenges, but never did.

For the last year and a half, I have been exercising regularly, and I had felt like nothing was really helping, that I wasn't losing any weight. About a month ago, when we were cleaning the house in preparation to move, I fell off the exercise bandwagon. I was so busy cleaning that at first I didn't have time to fit it in, and then I thought to myself, "Why bother? It doesn't help anyway!" Lo and behold, I gained 5 pounds almost immediately, and my pants were tight. Maybe it was making a difference! At least I wasn't gaining when I was exercising, right?

So, last Monday I joined my water pilates class, which was a blast. I got back on the bike yesterday, and I plan to ride every night during the week. I am really watching my calorie intake, so I am hoping this will all equal at least some weight loss. At least that nasty five pounds which are making my pants uncomfortable.

So, today is my first weigh in Wednesday. I am supposed to post my start weight here on my blog, and then my weekly weight loss from here on out every Wednesday. My weightloss goal is to loose 10 pounds by the end of the challenge, which ends on May 10th.

May I first just say, that after I post my weight, will you all please promise to still love me? And not to laugh at me? Because really-it is appalling. I do not even want to truly know myself. But, I guess accountability is the key, right? So, here goes....my start weight is.....

Oh lordy.
180

I am going to go pass out now.

Not Much

Not much is new today, other than I am so excited to start a new weekly water pilates class tonight. Normally I try to stay away from organized exercise classes because I am the world's most uncoordinated person. I stay away not just for my own safety, but for the other participants as well. Hopefully the water will help to control my movements a bit, although I will be asked to use a weighted dumb bell so that could be fatal.

Hopefully this will help to take off the three extra pounds that have crept up. They are not welcome on these here hips.

And a Good Weekend Was Had By All

We've had a splendid time around here the last couple of days. Friday was rather excruciating for me, as I had to help with a Book Bowl competition at school. The event itself was fun to help with, but days where I don't get to see my kids for more than the half hour it takes to get them dressed and to school are just plain awful for me. Sometimes I am tempted to go into their room and wake them up to play when I get home. It also meant I got a late start on my laundry, which is never a good idea around here.

We made up for it Saturday morning though when we went Boingz! for our cousin Bryce's 2nd birthday party. All three boys had a great time jumping in the bounce houses.

Saturday night was pure pleasure. Jeff and I had date night together, the first time we have been out in months. We went to see Bill Cosby perform live at the Orpheum Theater in downtown Omaha. I am such a big fan of Mr. Cosby that I seriously would have been happy if he had just came on stage and sat down and said nothing. Just to be able to say I was in the same room with him was enough for me.

He came out in sweat pants, a hoodie sweatshirt that said "Hello Friend" on the front, and blue crocs. Wouldn't that be great to be so comfy while you are on stage? The only thing on stage was a chair and a table, and he sat in the chair and talked to all of us as if we had always been friends. He told HIGHLARIOUS stories for 2 hours and 15 minutes, and I am not kidding you-my stomach hurt when it was all over. I have never ever laughed that hard for that long.

We went out to dinner at Red Lobster afterwards for Lobstah fest, and I totally indulged and had a lobster tail and garlic jumbo shrimp. TO DIE FOR. I have 2 extra inches on my hips to prove it.

My totally awesome father in-law came down to watch the kids, and they just are over the moon in love with him, so the boys had a good date night too. The only downside is that Papa John never comes empty handed, so he had loads of junkfood loot with him. This morning I opened my fridgerator door to see a bag of Peanut Butter M&Ms staring me in the face. THERE IS NOT A YUMMIER CANDY!!!! This will not help my diet. So far I have avoided them. I will be pushing them on the boys for desert tonight in self preservtion.

It's a good day when...

I asked Sam on the way home from school today if he had had a good day at school. He said, "Yeah Mommy. I made a mess. I made Tessa cry 'cause I ate her candy. It was fun." What more is there to ask for when you're a toddler?!

Nervous nervous nervous!

Do you ever feel overwhelmingly anxious?

That's exactly how I feel today. The worst part? I can't put my finger on why. Maybe end of the school year deadlines? A really busy weekend ahead? The piles of laundry overtaking my house?

Probably all of the above.

I had to work really hard today at not biting people's heads off, and not bursting into tears at strange times.

So instead of freaking out, I am trying to focus on the things I am thankful for, and the blessings I have in my life. I am so hoping for a more relaxed tomorrow.

Oh The Places I Have Lived!

Welcome back to Table Topic Tuesday! Today's question is:

Where have you lived, and what were your favorite things about each place?

I haven't lived in very many places. In fact, I have lived in Omaha, Nebraska all of my life, with the exception of a brief two years in college when I moved to Lincoln, Nebraska. Which is all of 5o miles away.

I'm okay with this, as I love the midwest. I love Nebraska. I love the people here. All of my extended family, with the exception of two aunts are here as well, and I love that I have so many people that I love within arms reach. I've always wanted to live in a small town, and I am trying to convince Jeff that we need to retire to one. Hopefully one day I'll get to add a tiny picturesque town to my list.

Here in the Big O, I have lived in three different houses with my parents, and two with my husband. I loved the house I lived in for the first four years of my life. Mostly because it was just me and my sister back then. Not that I don't love my two little brothers, but I loved it when it was just Sarah and me. I felt so cradled in love from my parents, and my little sister was my best tag along buddy.

I also loved the house that Evan and I moved into when he was three years old, and I had finally finished college and gotten myself gainfully employed. It was tiny, but absolutely perfect. I have had many wonderful things happen in my life since the day we moved into our little bungalow, but not many have come close to the joy I felt at finally being able to provide a home for myself and my little boy. I felt like we were finally our own official family. The space to be on our own allowed me to finally start introducing our own traditions. I loved every minute we spent in that house. Once we added Charlie and Jeff to the mix, we were busting out of the house at the seams and I knew we needed to move on, but OH MY was it hard to leave that place.

So-where have you lived? What did you like best?

Venturing Out on His Own

Evan and I were just a pair for the first 4 years of his life. (We refer to this as the time of our small family). As a result, we formed a bond that I think is a lot closer/different from other parent child bonds. In many ways, it was great. With only one person to pour my love and devotion into, I feel like he had a great beginning to his life. The downside was that with only me to depend on, Evan had a hard time separating from me. Make that HAS a hard time separating.

He has always been hesitant to venture out on his own, to do new things if I'm not there. Jeff and I have worked hard over the past few years to build his self confidence, and to get him to an independence level that we see other 10 1/2 year olds having. Being a world champion worry wort, that hasn't been easy, but on Saturday we made a big breakthrough.

The day was filled with glorious spring sunshine and warmth, so we herded all the boys out to the front yard to play. Evan loves his scooter, and after half an hour of encouragement, we finally talked him into taking a spin around the block. By himself.

Probably something small for other kids, but for my shy guy, worry wart who is overprotective of his mother and hates to leave my side-it was HUGE.

And the silly thing? I was so focused on pushing him out of the nest that I didn't realize how it would make me feel to see him speeding away from me, getting smaller and smaller. So bittersweet. I thought about how this was the first of many upcoming moments in the near future where he would be leaving me behind. So proud, and yet so sad.

This mothering stuff is a tough business.

A Girly Day, Complete With a Tiara

Today I had a wonderful morning spent with some of my favorite gals. The awesome Christi and I took Alyssa and my niece Brooke (aka Brookie Cookie/Brookelina) to see a performance of High School Musical on Ice. It's so nice to be able to borrow Brookie when I get a craving for something girly, pink, and full of singing and glitter.

Watching Brooke's face as the skaters first came onto the ice was priceless. She breathed an impressed and reverant "WOW!!!!" I'll never forget it. After a few minutes she declared," I NEED to know how to do that!"



The skating was great, and came complete with pyrotechnics, which impressed the little ones. I was amazed at how they could skate while dribbling a basketball, driving a golf cart, and riding a bike. For someone like me who can't even stand up on ice skates, this was nothing short of miraculous.



At the intermission we got some obligatory event food. Brookie had a hot dog, a pretzel with salt (which caused her to ask me why the pretzel had rocks on it, and why she was supposed to eat them), and a coke. That girl has a bladder of steel. She drank almost the entire medium sized pop, and then didn't have to go to the bathroom the entire rest of the time we were together. Wish my kids could do that!



Afterwards we got a souvenir of our day, which I found to be the perfect excuse to buy Brooke a pink, glittery, High School Musical tiara. I do love me a good tiara.



Thank goodness that with all of these boys around I have Brooke as my go to girl for an old fashioned girl day.

Thanks Christi and Alyssa!

What Money Just Can't Buy

Yesterday, Beth, over at I Should Be Folding Laundry asked her readers to leave her a comment telling her what they would buy if money were no object. I told her I would go out right this very minute and get a tummy tuck. I so envy people who have babies and then immediately are able to put their normal jeans back on. My ten pound babies stretched my skin to the limit. That, combined with my wickedly slow metabolism, German background (Good strong, big boned women!!), and poly cystic ovary syndrome left me with a lot of stretched out left over skin that will not return to it's normal shape no matter how much weight I lose, or how much I exercise and do crunches. It blows.

But, there is something I yearn for even more than that, and unfortunately it isn't something money can buy. What I really want? Is to be able to go somewhere like a doctor's office, a church, or a grocery store, and to think nothing of it. To be able to have each of these events be a calm experience. One where you are not trying to constantly keep your kids quiet. Where your heart is not pounding because you are just waiting for one of them to loose it, and then have to deal with it like it is really no big deal and be utterly calm about the whole thing.

Yesterday Evan had to go in to the eye doctor for a 6 week progress check. I took Sam and Charlie with me, as it was right after school and we would have to fly to get there in time, and also because I hate having to ask my mom all the time to watch the kids. Big mistake. Let it suffice to say that the doctor actually asked me not to bring them back for any of Evan's other appointments. I can kind of see her point, as it was hard for Evan to concentrate on what she was asking him to do, and I wasn't even able to talk with her about his progress because I could tell they were aggravating her. A lot. On the other hand, our appointment was at 4:00, and the tech didn't even come into the room until 4:45. The doctor didn't arrive until 5:10. Toddlers don't do well stuck in a small room for over an hour. I was so embarrassed I wanted to cry. I don't think their behavior was all that terrible, they were just being toddlers. I guess there are just certain situations that toddlers don't mix with.

Now I am in a pickle though. Evan goes to weekly therapy sessions, and check ups to this doctor every 6 weeks. That's a lot of time that the babies won't be able to come with us. I have no idea how that will work out.

I did dish out some tough love afterwards though. I had told the babies that if they were very good at the doctor we would go to McDonald's for dinner. Since they obviously didn't cut the mustard with their behavior, I bought dinner at McD's for everyone but them. They had a microwave pizza instead, and we made a huge deal out of how yummy our fries were, and how sad it was they hadn't made better choices at the doctor's so they could have some too. It made a BIG impression. Hopefully one that lasts.

Farmers Rock

Today I took my class on one of the most interesting field trips I have ever been on. And that is saying something. I have been teaching in daycares, public schools, and private schools since 1995. That's 14 years of field trips.

We attended the Triumph of Agriculture Expo today in downtown Omaha. It was a HUGE show of farm equipment, tractors, seeds, and everything farm related. That alone was amazing and so wonderful for my "city kids" to see. I was so very touched though by the MANY MANY farmers who were there who stopped to talk to my kids. They were so friendly, all took time to speak with the kids, and teach them about the equipment and farming. Every blessed one shook my hand and thanked me for exposing them to the profession of farming, to showing them how important agriculture is, and for encouraging them to work with the land. It was a blessing for the students and I to meet them, talk to them, and tell them we appreciate what they do and the sacrifices they make.

My group was lucky enough to be paired with Matt and Dylan, two 16 year old Future Farmers of America members, as our tour guides. These two young men patiently explained every bit of farm equipment we saw to my kids. They kneeled down on the floor with them, pointed out the underbellies of augers and what each part was for, answered all of their 6 year old questions with good humor, and shared what it was like to grow up on a farm. We came away with a new understanding of how incredibly expensive it is to be a farmer, that it is truly a science/business all rolled into one, and that it is a lot more complicated than we thought.

And a side benefit for me? (Don't tell my kiddos!) FARMERS ARE SO ADORABLE!!! I don't know what it is about a man in work boots, faded jeans, and a baseball cap, but good gravy they are kind on the eyes. Put all that next to a tractor, and I have trouble not fainting. Reminded me of that country song where the lyrics say something about "she thinks my tractor's sexy!" Totally true. Those farmer's wives are pretty lucky ladies!

Holy Test, Batman!

Oh my golly I am SOOOOO nervous! I just scheduled my test for my National Board Certification. I am going to have my brains fried on April 25th. FOR SIX GRUELING HOURS!

I have not taken a test that long since the ACT in high school. My stomach is rolling, and my nerves are already a wreck.

The thing that scares me is that there is not a whole lot you can do to prepare. They provide you with an online tutorial so that you can familiarize yourself with the format of the test, but there isn't a whole lot you can do to prepare for content. And what's more fun that walking into a 6 hour test blind?

I am going to go throw up now.

Prying Myself Away from My Laptop

I haven't read a book in about three months. This is a rarity for me. I love love love to read, but the pull of social media is like HEROIN I tell you. Who can stay away from Facebook! Twitter! Blogs! I love them all. Have to check them all. Multiple times a day.

So, I picked up a book by one of my fave authors, Jodi Picoult. It's her newest novel called Handle With Care. I am hoping it can help me pull away a bit, and get back into some of my favorite things.

So...I'm off to read! Maybe I'll blog a book review when I finish.

Decision

It's decided. We're staying put. For now.

We just couldn't find a house that we liked, and we both agree that we want our next move to be to our "dream" house, one we can see ourselves in for the next 15 or so years, and we don't want to settle.

So for now, we refinance. And we agreed to start looking again in a year. Hopefully the economy has picked up a bit by then.

In the meantime, we are going to do some home improvement projects to make our current home sparkle. Who knows? Maybe we'll end up wanting to stay!

So, this summer we are putting in wood floors in our living room and kitchen, and ceramic tile in the entry way. We are staining our deck and fence, and adding a retaining wall to the backyard. And maybe painting the master bedroom too. Busy summer, no?

At least I know though. I hate nothing more than LIMBO LAND. I like to know exactly what is going to happen next, and now that we have a plan, I can relax. And get excited! I love to pound a hammer when I have the chance, even though I can be dangerous with it. With my dad and Jeff's dad acting as foremen, maybe they'll keep me out of trouble!

Where, oh where, is the house for us?

We went house hunting again this morning, despite my strep induced delirium. Which certainly made the experience more entertaining.

The first house we visited, in a word, sucked. This word may have accidentally escaped my lips and floated out to the agents ears, which caused a loud guffaw from John, our uber patient agent. Normally, I wouldn't say this in a situation which requires me to be somewhat professional, or at least look like a grownup who is perfectly capable of spending a crap load of money on a home. However, it appears large doses of pain relievers lowers my inhibitions a bit.

The house was built in 1966, and if that was your favorite year, than this is the house for you, because it has not changed one bit. And by that, I even mean that the stove and oven were original to the house. Does that add character? I think not.

The second house we saw has been tempting us all afternoon. The layout? Perfect. The location? Awesome (as in 3 minutes from Grandma's house. My kids could walk over to play, and I might be left alone to have time to MYSELF!) The price? Great. BUT...it needs a new roof and furnace. Not a huge deal, as we would put that in as a contigency of our offer. But, it also needs some other updating. We would end up working to make it better for quite a bit. And, as longtime readers of this blog know, Jeff and I can hardly chage a light bulb. You may recall the time Jeff and I became locked in a bedroom with Sam when attempting to change out a doorknob, leaving Charlie free to attack the house with a Sharpie marker. One of the highpoints of Charlie's young life, to be sure.

So, we have spent the rest of the day feeling like our brains are in a pinball machine as we bounce around from one option/decision to another. I am actually leaning towards staying here, refinancing, doing some home improvements, and looking again in a year. Although that could be because my ears feel like they are going to explode out of my head, and I am so tired I can't imagine packing up all of our stuff and setting up house somewhere else.

Maybe we'll try sleeping on it, and the decision will be waiting for us when we wake, all wrapped up with a bow. Wouldn't that be awesome?!

Aaaannd...I'm sick. Again. I know you're shocked.

Just found out I have strep throat. And a double ear infection. Which would explain a lot about how I have been feeling the last few days.

The real miracle here is that all three boys were patient enough to sit in the waiting room, the exam room, and the pharmacy waiting room with me long enough for me to get treated and medicated. Seriously. You have no idea how awesome this is. We bought a large bag of sugar coated colorful popcorn to celebrate. I am not above bribing my children. It's totally worth it, and a highly effective parenting tool in emergencies.

The miracles just kept coming as we pulled into the driveway, and Jeff pulled in right behind us. Home before eight o'clock! May wonders never cease! He fed the kiddos their bribe, popped them into the tub, and put them to bed. I have been able to sit and rest on the couch uninterrupted for 3 hours.

May the healing begin.

Table Topic Tuesday...Except it's Thursday

I flubbed up my record this week for Table Topics. It's been such a crazy week! But I am going to catch up now...

This week's question is: Who do you sorely miss?

I didn't even have to think about this one. I SORELY miss my Grandma Sophie. She died 16 years ago when I was 16 in 1993. I can't believe that she has already been gone for as long as I knew her. My Grandma was one HECK of a lady. She raised 10 kids and did a damn fine job of it. She was fun, loving, and jolly. She loved her grandkids and pinched your cheeks and told you "I looooove ya!" every time she saw you. Her laugh was amazing and she could sing songs in Polish. She always let us have more desert and her mantra about food was "a little bit won't hurt!" She was the best house keeper I ever met, but even though her house was immaculate, a herd of grandkids running through didn't bother her at all, and we were free to have fun and make messes.

Her quiet yet strong faith in God was a rock in her life, and a wonderful example to others. She was terrified of storms and would have us join her in a rosary if a strong one was coming through.

Once I saw her kill a bee in church by slamming a hymnal loudly smack dab on top of it, right in the middle of a silent part in the service. She just grinned and waved at all the peolple who turned to look. My sister and I giggled and snorted, and she smiled back.

She had the strength to bury her 17 year old daughter and help the rest of her family through the tragedy. I don't know that I could do that. She was, in short, one of the most amazing women I have ever known. I think about her everyday, especially since I have become a mother. When my three boys overwhelm me, I imagine her with 10 kids, and tell myself to suck it up.

I sorely miss her, and I look forward to seeing her again. I just know she will be one of the first people I see in heaven. I love her dearly.

Stress

It's been a stressful couple of days around here. Yesterday was very sad for our family. We buried my Uncle Clyde, who passed away last week after a long battle with lymphoma. I am so sad that my aunt and cousins had to say good-bye to a wonderful husband, father, and grandfather. I am glad that he is no longer in pain. Cancer is a horrible disease, and a horrible thing to have to watch a loved one go through. My prayer today is that my aunt and her family have the strength and peace of the Lord as they go through the difficult days ahead.

I took Charlie in for a hearing test on Friday as a part of the speech evaluation his pediatrician recommended. Luckily, his hearing test came out fine. In fact, he hears so well that only 1% of the population can hear sounds as high as he can, or as soft. It is a curse that I have as well. Maybe I'll tell you about my "dog hearing" (as my family calls it) sometime. It's a long story though so I'll save it for later. Unluckily, the timing of the test meant that I had to take the whole day off of work Friday. And then again Monday. And then again this coming Friday so Charlie can go to the eye doctor. It is TOTALLY a pain in the butt to take time off work as a teacher. I may never dig out from under the piles of work on my desk after this.

Jeff came home from work today with a fever, and sick to his stomach. I don't mind taking care of sick people, especially when they are my husband or kids. But I am so afraid I am going to catch it, and have to take off yet more time from work.

And to top it off-DID YOU SEE THAT JERK ON THE BACHELOR LAST NIGHT?!! I can't believe I totally fell for his single dad charms. Couldn't he have broken up with her ahead of time, instead of, oh-I don't know, ON NATIONAL TELEVISION?!!! I may have to boycott next season. I am totally disgusted.

Here's to hoping for a better Wednesday.

Bummer

We went to look at a house today. We have only found about 3 to put on our list, as there doesn't seem to be a lot out there that meets our qualifications. Which I guess means we're picky. Which also means I really, really, really want one of these three houses to work out.

This one didn't. It was so disgusting I can't even believe the agent had the guts to list it under their name.

There was mold growing on the walls in the basement, there was water damage everywhere, and they hadn't even bothered to vacuum. You see some amazing things about the way people live when you go through houses. Sometimes it isn't pretty.

I'm really disappointed, but I am still hopeful one of the other two will work out.

At the very least, the whole thing made me feel better about listing out house. It's very clean and well kept compared to a lot of the other stuff out there.

I really just want to know what is going to happen one way or the other. I hate living in limbo land.

My Guardian Angel Deserves a Raise

On Thursday we had Service One come out to the house to do their annual furnace inspection and cleaning. The technician found some interesting things.

Since we were at work while he was here, he left his note about the work he did on the kitchen counter. Next to the note was a pile of 6 bottles of acrylic paint, 4 paint brushes, a battery, and a plastic ball. He noted that he dug all of these nifty items out of the BURNER COMPARTMENT of our furnace. Now, I don't know about you, but the words BURNER COMPARTMENT bring to mind images of fire. Probably not a good place to store your paint bottles, eh?

I was especially impressed when I noted that on the sides of the bottles of paint, it said "Highly flammable. Do not store near open flame." All the more reason to STORE IT IN YOUR FURNACE!!!

My box of paints is stored in a box in the top shelf of our shelving units in the storage room, so I have no idea how they found themselves inside of the furnace. My guess is the cat. Or I suppose the herd of boys running around these here parts.

I can just see the look of disgust on my guardian angel's face. She's probably totally disgusted she ended up with me for an assignment. Living with boys equals living in a danger war zone.

I've Lost It

Tomorrow on our family calendar I wrote "Pick up old cans".

What the heck?! I have no idea what that means.

I've finally lost it.

It's That Time Again!

Welcome back to Table Topic Tuesdays!
Here is today's question:
If you were going to create a new holiday what would it be and how would people celebrate it?

Huh. I have thought about this all afternoon. The best I can come up with? Positives Day. I think it would make an excellent Hallmark holiday. This would be a day for you to count up all the GREAT things in your life, especially the small things that you take for granted day to day. You could give people a card telling them that they are one of your positives. You could post a list on your bathroom mirror with all of your wonderfuls.

I don't know about you, but I tend to focus on what is WRONG with everything. I forget to look at the good things. I was reminded of this a couple of times this week.

I read the blog Nie Nie everyday. If you don't read The Nie Nie Dialogues, (by Stephanie Nielson), she is a young mother of 4. She and her husband were in a plane crash in August, and she was critically burned, was in a coma for 4 months, and is now recovering. I think about her everyday, and what she might be going through. It makes me thankful for simple things, like being able to cook my kids dinner, and looking in the mirror and seeing a face that I recognize. These are things that Stehanie misses, that all of us would miss if we lost them, but that we don't pay much attention to on a daily basis.

My uncle is dying this week from lymphoma, a disease he has battled for a long time. I am so sad for him, but I also can't stop thinking about my aunt. I simply cannot imagine loosing Jeff. I need to take more small moments each day to appreciate that he is in my life. That we are healthy. That he is the wonderful man he is and that I am lucky enough to be with him everyday.

So here's to Positives Day, and recognizing the little things that we love, and don't take enough notice of. I'm off to kiss my kids and tell my husband how much I love him.

In Need of Mary Poppins

Jeff and I attended an Open House down the street from us yesterday. The house is very similar to ours in layout and style, so we wanted to see what their asking price was, and chat up their agent a bit while we there. We got some good information, but we also got super overwhelmed.

The people that live in the house are a young married couple, without kids. Which apparently gives you time to beautifully decorate your house. And it looks like things stay where you put them, and no one tracks dirt on your carpet, and nobody spills sippy cups on the carpet. When I say to you the house was immaculate, I am totally understating it's perfection. I came out doubting that people actually inhabited the space.

When we walked back through our own front door, I saw the carpet I have been battling for three years. The dings in the paint from people throwing toy cars. The clutter accumulated by three boys. And when I thought about trying to get our house ready to put on the market and show, I fainted away on the floor. Okay, now I am exaggerating, but at that moment I wished I was a fainter, because it would have fit the situation perfectly.

So, I picked a room to attack first and ended up with our storage room. If I was being truthful with you, I would admit that there were boxes in that room that I have not opened one time since we moved in, and that the crap is astounding piled up against the walls. Instead I will lie to you and say that of course every piece of flotsom and jetsom in that room was meaningful and purposeful.

Seriously. Apparently in high school I strongly believed it was EXTREMELY necessary to save every scrap of paper I ever wrote on because MY THOUGHTS WERE THAT IMPORTANT! Someday this note to a person in 3rd period I no longer remember COULD save the world. At least I got a good laugh out of it. My idealism was slightly nauseating, but provided great entertainment value, especially to my husband who spent the next few hours snorting uncontrollably with laughter, spurting phrases like, "I love him so much! He's my SOULMATE!!!" My advice to the young? Throw away that crap before your husband can use it as blackmail.

Sadly, we aren't done with that room yet. Happily, we do have a pile of 10 bags of trash, and a pile of things I am going to list on Craig's List. We're going to keep plugging tonight, and maybe in 10 years my house will be presentable for the general public. Until then, I will leave you with this gem. Presenting MOI, at my senior prom.

Who ordered the defective eyeballs?!

I took Charlie in on Thursday afternoon for his 3 year check up. The boys had a blast, as they all view our pediatrician as a good friend who loves to play with them and hear about their lives. Most of the news was good-he is growing tall and strong, and is in the 97% for height and weight. He broke 40 pounds, so if I want, I can move him into a booster car seat. He has hit all the other developmental milestones they look for to track their development.

BUT....

Dr. B did recommend that he be evaluated by the public schools for speech articulation. I guess that's not a huge surprise to me. He was a late talker. Charlie talks a mile a minute now, but to people who aren't his mother he is often garbled sounding. So, next Friday we are off to have his hearing tested through Millard, and then they will come out to the house to take a history and do an evaluation.

AND...

When Dr. B turned off the lights to check his eyes, I noticed he was particularly careful. He took an extra long time. He told us he thinks Charlie may be developing some nearsightedness, but also that he may be seeing some atypical movements in his right eye (as in they are not tracking together). Just like Evan's eye problem. My stomach dropped to the floor. Even though the things Dr. B was seeing in his eye weren't nearly as pronounced as Evan's eye movement at it's worst, the thought of another one of my kids having to suffer through this makes me sick. I guess I shouldn't be surprised about this either, as Dr. Vicky (the eye doctor) had warned us it is highly genetic. And I am hopeful that if it does turn out to be the same thing, at least we are aware of it a lot sooner, and hopefully it can be treated sooner as well, preventing many of the reading and academic issues Evan has had to face. So on March 6th, Charlie will have the same 2 hour eye exam that Evan had in October. Yeah for doctor bills!!!

Now I am watching Sammy like a hawk. Wouldn't it be great to have at least one kid who was "normal" and just developed the way they should? For his sake?! As a mother it is torture to see your kids have to deal with things that make life harder.

Moving?

Jeff and I moved into our house three years ago. It seemed huge and cavernous when we arrived, but as it often goes, things are feeling a bit smaller now. Three boys and their toys take up a lot of space. It's not horrible, though, and if we didn't need to refinance anyway in April, I wouldn't even think about typing this next sentence.

We're thinking about moving.

It stresses me out to even think about it. Which may deter us in the end. I hate packing. I hate moving. I REALLY REALLY hate change. I form emotional attachments to houses and the memories their walls contain. Our house is the place I raised two of my babies, and spent long hours walking the floors with infants in the dead of night. It's the place my dad has painted and built a fence. When I think about leaving that, I want to vomit.

But, it is turning out that it might be the best financial move. We'd like to get over to Sarpy county for lower property taxes, and there are some great deals on houses right now. I think it would be very possible for us to end up with a lot more house for a lot less in the monthly payment.

Nothing is for sure, which is good for my emotional state. But I guess we'd better start looking and thinking.

Word Families

Every week my class studies a new word family. For example, last week our word family was -ight, so we studied words like knight, bright, and sight. One of the activities I do with the kids involves making a chart on which we brainstorm and record words that would be in the family of the week, and then we use them to write sentences and to include in our writers workshop writing.

This week's chunk is -uck. I dread this word family. For the past six years of teaching this word family I have been terrified an innocent child will think of THE WORD. You know the one. All the while we brainstorm words and make our chart, this word is screaming through my head and I am fervently praying, "Please don't say it. NOBODY SAY IT!"

And today, for the first time in six years, it happened. Someone gaily offered up the word. The f bomb. And I wanted to melt into the floor. I have thought about how I will handle this for SIX YEARS. Each time I think of another brilliant thing to say. But today? All I came up with, "Sorry! That's not a word."

I didn't wait to see if anyone wanted to argue that point with me. We moved right along to the next activity.

Sometimes I think being a teacher is going to take 20 years off my life! The things they come up with sometimes give me heart attacks!!

Table Topic Tuesdays

Here's today's Table Topic Tuesday question:
Would you rather be smarter, more athletic, or better looking?

Hmmmm. I am having a REALLY hard time answering this one. I know I should pick smarter. Obviously, that helps you to go far in life.

But if I am honest? Deep down? I would have to pick the more shallow answer and say better looking. When I was a pre-teen and going through the absolute hell of junior high, I was not pretty to look at. I had the worst perm you have ever seen, coke bottle glasses, a face full of acne, and was about 20 pounds over weight. I was teased and bullied mercilessly. It is because of this that NONE of my kids will attend a public junior high. I remember standing once talking to a group of friends before school started in the morning, and a group of boys stood behind me calling my name and barking like dogs.

I will NEVER EVER forget that. I think it still colors my experiences and feelings today. And so if I am honest, I would have to say I would always pick beauty over brains. At least life is less painful, especially as a child.

So Awesome!

I know it is totally cliche right now, but one of my favorite book series EVER is the Twilight series by Stephenie Meyer. I could read the books back to back endlessly and be happy as a clam.

This weekend I FINALLY got to see Twilight the movie in the theaters, (which worked out well, I guess, because it had dropped down to the el cheapo dollar theater, saving me a bundle, especially since I splurged on the ridiculously yummy nachos) and it was SO SO SO SOOOOOO awesome. I am lucky it is coming out on DVD soon, because I need to watch it at least 7 million more times.

Whoever played Jacob is the most delicious specimen of the male species I have laid eyes on in a long time. Except Jeff of course. Ahem. I totally have a 12 year old, school girl crush on him.

I am twitching just thinking about the whole experience, which lucky for me included Christi, who was as giddy as I was.

It was an interesting day around here yesterday...

Omaha is typically a pretty snowy place in the winter time, but this year, Mother Nature waited until yesterday to send us our first significant snow fall. This was the view out my back door at about 1:00 in the afternoon:



So pretty don't you think! I was loving the snow (since we had the day off from school and I didn't have to drive in it) until we had to go out and shovel it. It was a very wet and heavy snow, and at about 7 inches at our house, it took me quite awhile. The upside was that Evan is starting to put some muscle on him, and for the first time he was a huge help in the snow removal process. Charlie really enjoyed taking his small, child sized shovel and flinging everything I had just moved back onto the driveway with alarming speed. I watched our neighbor's three teenage boys clearing their driveway, and thought "SOMEDAY!!!"


And unfortunately, this picture shows what used to be the end of my cat Ray's tail:



Evan was trying to shoo him out of his room, and thought he was all the way out the door. Apparently his tail hadn't quite made it. Luckily, most of it is fluff, but there was a tiny bit of the end of the tail skin that was taken off by the bedroom door when it shut on his tail. Strangely, Ray didn't make a peep when it happened. Evan made the horrific discovery on the floor, so we hunted up the cat, and it was bleeding a bit, but nothing terrible. Evan has always had a tremendous guilt complex about everything, so he bawled for the rest of the day, prayed to God for forgiveness, and begged of Ray to have mercy on him. I thought this was punishment enough, as it is apparent he will never forgive himself for hurting his favorite companion. And it wasn't a purposeful act either. Amazingly, the cat still seems to like us, even after his horrible day.

Maybe there is some truth to the whole Friday the 13th thing after all!

Driving Alone

Yesterday at school we had parent teacher conferences. Daycare closed before I was done, so Jeff got off work early to come pick up the kids from school.

Which meant that I got to drive home alone. Alone in the car. It NEVER EVER happens to me anymore. I always have at least one or two of the kids in the car with me, but most often it's all three.

When they're not with me? I feel COMPLETELY anxious. Instead of enjoying the wonderful peace and quiet a ride by yourself can provide, I have an overwhelming urge to get home to my babies. I envision the dire things that could happen to me or the kids while we are apart, and I have this feeling I might not see them again. It's not that I don't completely trust Jeff to watch the kids. He is an awesome Dad, and he does a fabulous job. It just feels so unnatural to be separated from them.

Which is probably not healthy. I need to get out more, me thinks.

Look Over There ------>

Check it out! I feel like I am an "official" blogger now, because the uber talented Christy from Ruby & Roja (who did the design for my blog) created a button that readers can add to their pages. If you want to of course. I'll just mention here that if you did I would be SO happy.

Isn't it cute? And doesn't Christy do great work?!

I'd be honored if you'd grab it!!

My Valentine

In the hallway at school leading up to the preschool/daycare area, each child has a label with their name on it, and the teachers hang art projects next to it. This morning when we walked down the hallway, we noticed that Valentines created by the kids had been hung up. Each child made their own heart, and then dictated to their teacher a sentence about who they love, which was recorded in the center. Many children had long lists to cover all the loves in their life, but Charlie's was short and sweet, and made my day:




Such a simple thing, but so wonderful to a mother's heart.

And this afternoon, after 7 weeks of eye therapy, a VERY momentous occasion occurred. On the way home from school Evan took out a book to read in the car. FOR PLEASURE. I was so surprised to see him reading without me having to poke and prod him with a fork first I asked him if it was for homework. He looked at me and said, "No it's just a good book. I want to see what happens next!" My jaw dropped open, and I wanted to cry. This was no small moment for us. What joy to see your child conquer something that has been a major battle for them all their life, to see them enjoy reading for the first time, using a skill they will use for the rest of their days. I have waited 10 1/2 years for this moment. And it was so worth it. So we took a picture to remember the joy we both felt.



And the truly amazing thing? He finished this short chapter book in only TWO DAYS! I am praying we have turned the corner.

Table Topic Tuesdays

Today's post is inspired by Christy over at Real Life Adventures. Her family got a neat game for Christmas by the same name that has questions printed on cards for your family to answer and discuss around the dinner table. Cool idea, huh?!

Christy decided to continue the discussion on Tuesdays on her blog using these cards. Today she invited other bloggers to join in, so without further adu, here is today's question:

What is the hardest thing you've ever done?

As you may or may not know about me, I had anorexia nervosa in high school. I am 5 foot 8 inches and at my lowest point I got down 98 pounds. It is something I still struggle with everyday. A little secret-when I look in the mirror, I still see a 500 pound person.

Anyway, after I was finally diagnosed, and the doctor had sat my mother down and spelled it all out for her and put a name to the problem, I initially felt a HUGE sense of relief that someone knew what was wrong with me. My parents and the doctor then had a big serious talk with me and detailed what would happen if I continued to starve myself. DEATH. Which despite how I looked, was not what I wanted. They gave my parents a strict eating plan that I was to follow to the letter if I was to stay out of the hospital. That's when the relief turned to panic.

The hardest thing I have ever done was to make myself eat that first meal. I had to do it alone where no one could watch me, because it made me feel weak, powerless, and less in control to put food in my mouth. And afterwards, I had to sit with my best friend for a long time with her arms around me so that I wouldn't go running to burn off the calories, or take some Exlax to get rid of things. I love my friend Katy to pieces, and one of the reasons is because she helped me to save my own life.

I will NEVER forget having to choke down that food. It makes me feel anxious just to think of it now. It was harder than childbirth, and being left by my fiance pregnant and alone.

However, I am immensely glad I got past that first step because each step afterwards was so much easier.

So, come on bloggers! Play Table Topic Tuesday with us! If you do, link to Christy's site.

It's an Honor

There are five special little guys in my life. Five little ones that I think about and pray for everyday. The first three are my own kiddos, but I am also blessed to have two Godsons. One is my nephew Colin, and the other is the son of my dear friends, Joel. I guess God thought I would be extra good with boys. Or, extra bad with girls I guess. Whichever it is, I am so lucky to have these wonderful boys in my life.

Yesterday Joel turned two, and as I was driving home from his birthday party, I reflected on what an honor it is to be in Joel's life. In fact, I think it is the BIGGEST honor I have ever experienced. I was extremely honored to be present at Joel's birth. I think it means more to me, because although I think of Joel's mom Christi as a sister, we are not sisters by blood. And to be asked to be present at such an event when you are not a relative was a huge thing for me. A gift I will always treasure to have seen this spunky little guy make his entrance into the world.

And to be asked to be his Godmother? It was one of the most special days of my life. Not that being asked to be a Godparent is less special when you are part of the family, but it was immensely special to me to be chosen as Joel's, since I was not an aunt or an official member of the family. I was blown away, and have been thankful ever since.

Happy Birthday Joel, from the Dee who will always love you, and can't wait to see what you do in life. You are a gift to me, and I will treasure you always.

Mess

I loved this recent post on Cheaper By the Half Dozen where the author talks about her messy house. One of the things I love about reading blogs is that it makes me feel more normal. Isn't it great to know that you aren't the only one with a messy house, or naughty children, or bad hair?

The state of cleanliness in my house is one of the things that make me anxious on a daily basis. I don't just love neatness and order, I CRAVE it. It makes me feel calm and happy and in control. Unfortunately as a working mom with 3 boys and a husband who is never home, I never ever have enough time to clean. It is usually relegated to the weekends. But so are a million other things, and I never get to what I want to.

The other day I was exercising in the living room to one of my favorite exercise DVDs, when the woman on the TV screen ordered me to the floor for some push ups. The upside of this move was that the filth I was suddenly confronted with in an in your face manner totally distracted me from the torture of this inhumane form of exercise. The downside was that I realized I couldn't remember the last time I had vacuumed.

I berated myself for several minutes for not doing a better job. And then I remembered. I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE! And isn't that great? It helps a lot to know there are a lot of other dirty houses in America. My carpet may be full of fuzzies, but at least the kids are happy.

Fate

As I was telling Jeff good-bye this morning before I left for work, we were both lamenting over how tired we were from tax season hours, and how much we missed each other. I told him we needed an extra special date after tax season is over to celebrate and reconnect.

As we were driving to work, fate was with us, and I heard an announcement that tickets were going on sale for a performance by Bill Cosby the weekend after tax season is over. MY FAVORITE COMEDIAN! I love love love Bill Cosby. I love the Cosby Show. I still laugh uncontrollably at the reruns. I love his sense of humor.

So, I took the bull by the horns and bought two tickets online as soon as we got to school.

I CAN'T WAIT!!! A night on the town with Jeff and Bill-two of my favorite leading men.

Unique Talents

The other day in my classroom we were discussing how God gives each of us special talents. I explained that it is our job to find out how we can use these talents to serve God and to complete the vocation God is calling us to.

Apparently this conversation went right over the heads of some. I asked the kids to brainstorm and share with us some talents that they had. Some answers were great, like being good at math, being able to grow things in a garden, and liking to talk with new people. And then, one little boy raised his hand and said, "My talent is that I can stand four big steps away from the urinal and still get all the pee in!"

I'm not sure how that will help you in any type of vocation, but I could be wrong. You never know.

It's All Worth It

This morning one of my favorite students from last year came in to give me a hug before the school day started. She then proceeded to make my day with the following comment. "Mrs. Kleffman, I have been praying for my brother to get you as a teacher next year. He's not a very good reader, and I know you will make reading easy for him just like you did for me. You taught me how to love words."

I will admit here and now that I melted into a puddle of goo and started to cry. So much of teaching goes unnoticed by other people. You don't always get to see the fruits of your labor. But those kind words? Made all 9 years worth it for me. Reminded me that what I do everyday makes a difference.

I gave her a hug, told her she made my day, heck-my whole year, and sent her off to 2nd grade with a smile on my face. If I have made learning, reading, or life more enjoyable or accessible for even one person, it is worth all of the stress, time, and effort.

Blah Blah Blah

I tried all day to think of something to write about on this here blog. And I couldn't come up with one single thing. Mostly because my brain is utterly fried. By 7:00 this morning I was already thinking about going to bed tonight. Which is in fact where I am right now. As soon as the boys were tucked into bed, I crawled under the covers too. I am making myself keep my eyes open until 9:00, because it seems slightly indecent to go to bed during the 8 o'clock hour.

I can't put into words how tired I have been the last several days. And you know what's dumb? Once I fall asleep, I keep waking back up. Even though I am totally tired, I just can't stay asleep. Probably stress I suppose. We have conference coming up next week, which means lots of extra work at school, Evan keeps getting assigned killer math homework which makes even my adult brain hurt and which I also have to do at the same time I am bathing children or cooking supper. Jeff is never home before 9:00. Sammy has been a bear because the antibiotic he is on is giving him major MAJOR diarrhea and his poor little bum has a huge case of diaper rash. Charlie is a crazy man. He has been having hair raising temper tantrums both at home and at school. My brother used to do the same thing when he was little and he turned out okay, but it still worries me. I think, "Is this kid unstable? Will he someday come after me while I am asleep with an ax?" And this weekend, a time when I normally try to rush around like a cray woman to catch up, is going to be killer. So many things going on. And not one of them will my hubby be home to help with, God bless him.

Anyway. Now that I have totally bored you with that stream of consciousness bout of complaining, I am off to bed.

So that I can wake up again in an hour.

Thanks for listening! I feel much better having let it all out!

Romance and Music

Today is the 1st of February. As soon as I turned the page on the calendar and saw the name of the new month pop up, I of course thought of the big day coming in two weeks: Valentine's Day!

I used to hate this day. Really, I probably still would if I were still single. It's a hard day to get through when you are an I and not a we and the whole country is talking about love. Since I met Jeff though, it has been a happy day for us to take time out of our busy lives to remind each other we love each other, and that we feel very blessed to have found each other. It is especially nice for me, as it comes smack in the middle of tax season, right around the time I am beginning to forget what Jeff's face looks like.

We never do anything big on V Day. We both hate fighting crowds at restaurants, and that whole thing seems rather contrived anyway. We like to just take time to sit and talk, without the kids or the TV to distract, and reconnect. Oftentimes we do this to music. My favorite Valentine memory was the V Day right after Charlie was born. He was not quite a month old, and I was overwhelmed from being a new mom without Jeff around very much (tax season again. Have I mentioned lately that I hate it?!) We managed to get Charlie and Evan off to sleep AT THE SAME TIME!! We poured ourselves some wine, put some music on the stero, and just talked for a long time. It was so nice to feel like myself for a couple of hours, instead of just a mom. Don't laugh too hard, but the CD we listened to was Stevie Wonder's Greatest Hits. It's what I had asked for that V Day. I love his disco stuff.

This Valentine's Day, the One to One Network introduced me to some new, AWESOME romantic music. It's called the Yanni Voices. It includes Yanni plus four awesome singers: Nathan Pacheco, Chloe, Leslie Mills, and Ender Thomas. Check out the website-the music is SOOOO relaxing and romantic. My favorite track is Before the Night Ends. It's the one thing I am asking for this V-Day!!! The CD is going to be released on March 24th. You can also check them out in a PBS special on March 2nd. (Jeff agreed to watch it with me, cause he's an awesome husband!)

How are you celebrating Valentine's Day this year?

And the germs just keep coming...

But, there was a bright spot in the day. Well, maybe a couple.

We only had a half day at school today, so Jeff was able to stay home with the kids in the morning, and I came home in the afternoon. No sick days used=awesome.

My new camcorder came in the mail today! I have been annoying the children by sneaking around them and recording their every move. I love having something that is easily uploadable to the computer. I love iMovie. I feel like Kevin Costner directing my own Oscar worthy film. Even if most of it today has just been of my children and their germs.

And don't you just hate having to listen to your own voice on things? I sound like a smurf. How do you y'all stand me?

Watch out! If I figure it out, this blog will have a lot more video clips!!!

Germ Invasion

We're having a super fun Thursday around here. Charlie and Sammy both got diagnosed with RSV today. On top of that Charlie also has strep throat.

We also heard the sad news that Jeff's grandma in Colorado is expected to pass away in the next couple of days after complications with pneumonia/flu.

When it rains, it pours.

The Man in the Checkered Pants

Today's post is inspired by one of my favorite bloggers, Sharon of Mom Generations, and her post yesterday called, I ain't afraid of no ghosts! At the end of her post, she asks her readers if they have ever had a ghostly experience. Which reminded me of the following story...

Once upon a time, when I was just a wee nine year old, I had an experience my whole family still teases me about today. My three siblings and I were home with my dad while my mom was out running errands. We lived in a split level house, and when you sat in the family room in the basement, you could see up the stairs and into the living room above. I was sitting on the couch downstairs watching TV when I saw a movement on the stairs out of the corner of my eye. When I looked over, I clearly saw a man climbing the upper level of the stairs. He continued to the top, and went on into the living room. I was terrified to see a man I didn't know in the house, and I ran to get my dad. I was so completely insistent on what I had seen, my dad asked me for a description of what he had looked like. The most overwhelming feature I could report on were the funny pants he had been wearing, which looked like the checkered pants that men sometimes wore in the 60s. My dad went off to check the house to check for an intruder, but he found nothing.

I never saw him again, and my family decided I was crazy. The man in the checkered pants has come to be one of those family stories everyone loves to laugh about. As I was growing up, if something got misplaced, we said the man in the checkered pants took it. If something strange happened-you guessed it! It was the man in the checkered pants who was responsible.

But you know what? I KNOW I saw that man. To this day, I am 100% positive I saw a man walk up the stairs. I can recall exactly what he looked like. Nobody in my family will ever believe me, but I saw what I saw.

Do I believe in ghosts? Maybe. I'm not sure. But I know I saw something strange that day that I won't forget. And I also know I can hear my sister snorting with laughter as she reads this post! =)

I'm Leavin' On a Jet Plane

Even though it's still a year and a half away, I am still super excited today! Last night Jeff and I decided we are going to take a trip, just the two of us, to celebrate our 5 year anniversary. WITH NO KIDS! We haven't been anywhere together, with or without kids, since our honeymoon. We don't know where we are going, but that doesn't really matter to me. Just getting some uninterrupted time with my handsome prince is enough for me.

Bring on the travel brochures!! WOOHOO!!!

Feeling Blessed to Be Alive

I had the scariest moment of my entire life this morning. On our way to work/school, with all three boys in the van, I hit a patch of black ice on the road. We did 4-5 complete 360s, went off the road twice, was on two wheels at one point where I really thought we were going to roll into the ravine, went into oncoming traffic and missed hitting 2-3 cars by inches, and caused another car to go off the road to avoid hitting us. The entire time we were viciously covering large areas of pavement and grass. I am so thankful God was watching over us and keeping us safe. All I could think about was that the kids were in the car with me.

We have teased my Dad for many years for repeating the same life lessons to us kids over and over and over again, but today I was supremely thankful for this habit of his. I could hear his voice in my head, as if he were right there with me saying, "DON'T stomp on the brakes Christy! Turn into the spin!" Which I did, although I don't know how. I was so aware of everything that was happening, almost like having super senses, and you just totally react on instinct. It was a strange calm, and as we were headed straight towards oncoming cars, I remember calmly thinking, "Okay-this one is going to hit us. Brace yourself." Miraculously, no one hit us, we didn't roll, and eventually, we ended up facing the right direction and in the right lane.

I will never in a million years forget those moments or the sound of my kids screaming in fear.

All the rest of the way to school, we SHOUTED our thanks to Jesus and our guardian angels, who were working over time to get us out of that one. I hope they are rewarded with whatever it is angels enjoy. I had so much adrenaline pumping through me, my skin felt prickly for quite awhile afterwards.

I am SO thankful to have all of my children in one piece, a van that is in one piece, and the chance to have a normal evening tonight, where I can love and hug my kids.

Ending the Week on a High Note

Last night we celebrated Evan receiving two stickers in the reward system at eye therapy. We had a family movie night and we all snuggled up on the couch and watched Wall-E. It was the first time I saw the movie, and as an adult, I thought it was great, but it really didn't hold the attention of the toddlers. The story line was a bit above their heads, which was a disappointment for Disney/Pixar, but still a god movie, and a great family time.

We had great news at eye therapy this week, where the doctor checked in on his progress now that we are at the four week mark. She is really pleased with how well he is doing, and says he is above average in his progress. Today, during home therapy, he was able to cross his eyes for the first time ever. It took a Herculean effort, but I am SOOO excited to see progress already!!!

We got our van back from the "car hospital" (as Charlie calls it) on Friday afternoon, and BOY does it feel good to have things back to normal. The great thing was that it wasn't the fuel pump, only a disconnected air pump, which only cost $100. Awesome.

And to top it off, my husband suggested AND offered to help with an organizing/cleaning project today. We took every scrap of paper out of our filing cabinets, all the flotsom and jetsom that have built up over our marriage. We scrapped and shredded 4 bags of trash, and reorganized all of our financial records. I love, love, LOVE organizing things. And to have Jeff help? Even better.

Fun and Excitement!

Have you ever tried to help a 4th grader with double digit long division at the same time you are cooking dinner at the same time you have two whining toddlers hanging on your legs?

It is the most fun ever, let me tell you.

It is so much fun, I sure hope I don't get to do it again tonight!