The Sole Woman

Company Girl Coffee: The Flu Edition

2012-01-13T14:17:00.001-06:00

I don't know about where you live, but here in Omaha, the stomach flu is going around BIG TIME! I have had many kids in the school where I teach out with it~sometimes for a week at a time. My brother is down with it today as well, and this morning as I was reading his post on Facebook I congratulated myself on keeping the bugs at bay for my family. "Great job cleaning this week!" I thought to myself. "Way to use the bleach and the Clorox wipes!" BIG MISTAKE.

My class had just returned from lunch, and we were settling in for an exciting chapter of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, when the school secretary came into my room looking apologetic. "I'm really sorry, but Evan is in the nurse's office with a fever." (My kids go to school where I teach). By the time we got home, his fever was 101 and he was very nauseous.

What a wonderful start to the weekend!

Now, I am just praying that it doesn't spread to the rest of us. My hopes aren't very high though! :)

If you missed my post earlier in the week, my biopsy results came back as completely normal!! Thank you to all of you Company Girls who prayed for me. I am so grateful.

When you're done reading this, you may want to use some hand sanitizer!!

Thank you LORD!

2012-01-11T17:17:00.000-06:00

I am sending praise and thanks heavenward today! I received good news on my biopsy...it was COMPLETELY normal! I don't have adequate words to express my relief. I have so many symptoms of what they tested me for that I had completely steeled myself to get the bad news.

I am feeling on top of the world! Thank you so much to each of you who offered me your support and prayers. It means so much to me!!

Now I am off to have a great end of the week!

Company Girl Coffee and OH What a Week

2012-01-06T16:44:00.001-06:00

I am having afternoon coffee at my blog today! Today was our second day back with kids, so I am sitting back and enjoying a cup of joe after a long day of teaching. Thanks for joining me!!

This week marked my return to work after a FABULOUS Christmas break. Boy oh boy did I need those two weeks to recharge. I enjoyed every second of it.

It was nice to go back and see my kiddos, and I loved hearing about their Christmas adventures. However, it's amazing to me how quickly my body gets out of teacher mode. My feet hurt from standing all day, and my throat hurts from talking all day long. I need to build up my endurance again.

Yesterday was a bit nerve wracking for me. I had to have a biopsy done, and am awaiting news on whether or not it is cancerous. It would mean so much to me if you could pray for a positive outcome. The whole experience has led me to think about how very blessed I am, and how very much I have to be thankful for. I have a husband I adore, three of the best boys on earth, and a job that I love and feel called to do. It doesn't get much better than that. So, today I am thankful for all of my blessings, and I am hopeful that this health concern comes to a positive end. I am finding comfort in knowing that whatever the outcome, the Lord is walking next to me, and will help me to face any challenges that may be coming my way.

Happy weekend everyone! I hope you have many opportunities to enjoy your blessings :)

Back to the Real World...

2012-01-03T09:16:00.000-06:00

Tomorrow I head back to work. I love being cocooned in the sense of timeless relaxation and rest that comes with Christmas vacation. Sometimes I have no idea what day it is. We spend large chunks of time in our pajamas. We eat when we're hungry, play when we're bored, and sleep when we're tired, and NOT because we have to adhere to the crazy school time schedule. I guess all things have to come to an end.

On Sunday, I could feel the inevitable end of break approaching, and as it happens every year, I get a crazy urge to organize the heck out of our house. I have this thought that if everything is just so, our reentry into our regular schedule will be a little bit smoother. And maybe it is for a little bit, but the crazies always come back.

At any rate, on Sunday the Christmas decorations came down and the regular decor went back up. I hate to see the holidays go, but it is so refreshing in so many ways to put the house back in order and go back to the clean and orderly.

Yesterday, I cleaned out under the bathroom sinks, and I went to Target to stock up on supplies to reorganize and refresh cleaning supplies in each area of the house. Then I REALLY went crazy and did a years worth of shredding and filing financial papers. WHY do I put this job off so long?!! It was boring as all get out, but at least it's done, and we will be ready to tackle the taxes soon.

Jeff has been home way more this vacation than he has been able to do in the past, and it has been heavenly. I love getting to spend this time with him before the horrors of tax season begin. It's the main reason I hate January. It steals my husband away to the office.

Sigh...it's time, I know. But I am going to be dragging my heels the whole way.

A Christmas Recap...A Little Late

2012-01-02T10:03:00.000-06:00

We had a good holiday this year. Charlie and Sammy are at a fun age (and I love that at Christmas time, they are both the SAME age! This year they are 5!) where they are full of belief in the magic and wonder of Christmas and Santa, but they are also beginning to have a solid belief and understanding that Jesus is the reason we are celebrating. I love watching their faith emerge, and see how important it is to them. It's one of the many times I am glad we made the decision to send them to a private, religious school.

Here are some highlights from our Christmas celebration:


This is one of my ALL TIME favorite pictures of my boys.

I love getting the boys all dressed up for things. I need to be better about making sure they have dressy wardrobe options. It's something that I find easy to overlook with boys.

Jeff and I on Christmas Eve

Jeff hates having his picture taken, and rarely lets me get him in a good shot. (This one was taken by Evan! It helps to have someone else in the house who can click the shutter in an intelligent way.) I am always a little sad when I see slideshows of couples at weddings, because pictures of Jeff and I are few and far between. Our slideshow would have maybe five pictures. So, I am super thankful to have captured this.

It's a girl!!

My brother Creighton and his awesome wife Lindsey are expecting a baby in July. This is my Mom discovering on Christmas Eve that IT'S A GIRL!! We have 6 boys and now 2 girls as grandkids in our family. This was a huge Christmas gift for all of us. I can't wait to see these two become parents.

Sammy feeding "Elizabeth"

Someday Sammy may kill me for posting this picture, but I love it. This year, my Sammy who is my rough and tough football obsessed boy, asked for a Baby Alive. Jeff was slightly horrified and asked him why. Sammy said, "I want to practice being a good Daddy!" And how does that not melt your heart? I love this about him, so Santa was on a mission to find a Baby Alive. He named her Elizabeth, and I love watching how careful and gentle he is with her. He is going to make a FANTASTIC husband and father someday. You're welcome future daughter in law!!!

Evan's favorite gift of 2011

This year, despite my protestations, my brother Creighton and my BIL Luke bought Evan a TV for his bedroom. Creighton also gave Evan an XBox 360 to go with it. Evan loves his new additions to his bedroom...I'm just sad we may never see him again, as it's hard now to get him to come out of his room! :)

VERY early Christmas morning

This year my choir at church sang at midnight Mass, so this picture was taken very early on Christmas morning, after "Santa" had made his delivery. I love this moment...everything frozen in a cozy Christmas scene, before the fun begins.

I hope all of you had a great Christmas too...I'm just sad we have to wait a whole year for it to be back. I truly believe it's the most wonderful time of the year!!

Good Bye 2011

2011-12-31T15:21:00.000-06:00

One of my favorite bloggers, Audrey McClelland from Mom Generations, says at the end of the year she likes to look back at three things: health, happiness, and family. I really like this idea...to me these are some of the most important things in my life, with the addition of faith.

I struggled with my health this year. In light of my Dad's death at only 58 from genetic heart issues, I am hyper aware of my health. I know that what I do now can greatly affect how much time I get to spend on earth with my precious family. My PCOS is getting worse, and I know this can also impact my heart health. I feel great that my new diet, which is really more of a lifestyle change, is helping this. I've already lost 10% of my body weight. I have an appointment scheduled with a new specialist next week, and I going to be picking the brain of a very wise friend who also has PCOS to hopefully get more of my symptoms under control. It's my goal in 2012 to do everything I can to get healthier.

There isn't a day that goes by that I am not thankful for my family. We have had our challenges this year with both Evan and Charlie, but Jeff and I took positive steps in helping our children to improve in their academics and their behavior. It's been hard, but I am so proud of us for working hard on these things. Parenting...no one can prepare you for how HARD it can be!! This year, I want to be more purposeful and present in my actions as a Mom. Too many days I am just trying to get by and get through. I don't want to waste my time with them.

And my husband...my wonderful husband. Jeff is the greatest gift I will every receive from the Lord. Having this man to walk next to in this journey is a blessing I am thankful for EVERY.SINGLE.DAY. I try not to ever take him for granted. I fall more in love with him every day I have the honor of being his wife.

Happiness and faith have been so intertwined for me since September 28, 2010, the day my Daddy went to heaven. In 2011, we continued to heal. We are learning to be happy again. But I have learned you never ever stop grieving, and the hole in our family will always be there. You just learn how to cope with it...which for me is through faith. It brings me such comfort to know that my Dad's life and death, and how it intertwines with my own, was known by God and in His hands long ago. It brings me comfort to know that God is working great things in my heart through this experience, and that He has never left my side as we move through this new life without my Dad. And above all, I take joy in knowing I WILL be with my Dad again, and I want him to be proud of how I carried on and the life I lead after he had to leave. It's my goal in 2012 to make choices that both my Heavenly Father and my Dad will be proud of.

I'm looking forward to 2012. I am hoping to have a year of growth. I want to be a blessing to those around me.

Company Girl Coffee AND a Long Overdue Update

2011-12-30T09:33:00.002-06:00

It's been forever since I've done two things...

1. Post something new on my blog
2. Participate in Company Girl Coffee

SO, I am going to try starting off 2012 the right way by doing both. Welcome to all of you Company Girls! Please take some coffee (mine is Starbucks, fresh out of my coffee maker~wish I could send you some!) and relax with me for awhile.

So much has been happening here! Charlie is LOVING Kindergarten. So much so that he wanted to go back to school the Monday after Christmas. Crazy, right? He is doing a great job with learning to read, which is such a relief to me. Evan, our oldest, was diagnosed with a learning disability when he was in Kindergarten. School has been such a struggle for him, and it breaks my heart! I have been praying hard for Charlie and Sammy that they will not have this hardship in their lives.

I have finally started to achieve one of my New Year's Resolutions for 2011, even though it happened late in the year. I went to my doctor at the end of October, and told him how extremely frustrated I was with dieting. I had been running 3 miles, 5 days a week and doing Weight Watchers for months and I was GAINING weight!! Can you believe it? I was ready to give up completely. My thought was if dieting makes me gain weight, I'm going back to eating whatever I want! Dr. A put me on a low glycemic index/Atkins type diet, and suddenly the weight started melting away. Since November 6th, I have lost 21 pounds. Such a relief!! Since my Dad died, I've really been trying to get my health and weight under control, and I am so glad to finally be on the right track. (Also, it's been lots of fun to get new SMALLER clothes for Christmas!)

So, with one of my long time goals on the right track, I am recommitting to making Sanctuary in my home in 2012. This is an area I really let slide this year...as usual I am having a hard time balancing work (I am a teacher and always have lots of work to do at home, as well as at school), being a wife and mom, and somehow keeping my house clean. I am looking forward to working with Rachel Ann and the other Company Girls at Home Sanctuary to achieve this!!

Happy 2012 everyone! My prayer for my family and yours is that it's a GREAT one!!!

One Year

2011-09-28T08:14:00.001-05:00

One year ago today, at 10:45 AM, I said good bye to my hero...my Dad.

I miss him. Every single day. I think about him all the time, I pray for him all the time.

The thing I've learned about grief this year is that it doesn't really go away or get better. You just learn to live with it, and it becomes your new normal. I hate having to have a normal that doesn't include my dad.

I love you Daddy. You will always be my hero. I love you to the moon and back.

Hello FALL!

2011-09-04T12:01:00.001-05:00

It is the most glorious of fall days here in Nebraska. Yesterday morning dawned hot and muggy, much like the rest of the summer here in the midwest. Around 3:00, a cold front blew through with some pretty strong winds, and a few raindrops. When it had past, miracles of miracles, the humidity was gone, the sun came out, and it was beautiful!

We left our windows open over night, and it was so nice to air the house out and turn off the A/C. Today, as I type this, my windows are still open and there is a beautiful cool breeze blowing in. I did some fall deep cleaning yesterday, and when I was finished, I treated myself by getting out my fall decorations. Here is my mantel...

I am a summer girl at heart, but I do love fall as well. I love the apple orchard and the pumpkin patch, and all of the fun activities that go along with the great weather during this beautiful season. And after three months of sizzling Nebraska summer heat, we are always ready for a cool down.

I think we are all finally on the mend around here. Charlie and Sammy are both slowly getting over their bout with croup and high fevers. Jeff and Evan are feeling better too. Me? I am marveling over the fact that I am the only one who hasn't gotten sick. (Knock on wood!) Maybe after 12 years of teaching my immune system is FINALLY getting better!

My family is coming up on some tough days during the month of September. September 13th would have been my Dad's 59th birthday. Our first without him. On the 28th, it is the one year anniversary of his death. Both come with an aching sadness over not being with him. I feel strongly that on both days we need to create some new traditions...traditions that focus on celebrating Dad's life, and not just remembering his death. Because his life was so much more powerful, positive, and beautiful than the 8 weeks that took him from us. So, on Dad's birthday I invited my family over to have Dad's favorite meal of fried chicken and cherry pie. On the 28th, we will meet at the cemetery and hold a prayer service, and then we will go to Dad's favorite restaurant and remember good times and the many reasons why we love him so. On both days, we will be together, and I am certain beyond certain that Dad will be with us too.

Sigh

2011-08-30T20:18:00.000-05:00

We have only been back in school for two weeks and 2 days, and we are already knee deep in germs here at our house. Sammy came in and woke me up at 2:00 in the morning, sounding like a cross between a pack a day smoker and a barking seal. He also had a fever, and raging case of the croup. (Only 4 kids in his preschool class were well enough to come to school today!) Jeff stayed home with him, which was nice for Jeff since he is a dealing with a nasty cold himself.

Evan has been falling asleep in the car on the way home from school everyday, as he also has a nasty cold. So far, only Charlie and I are safe. Fingers crossed.

I can't believe this is happening in August! I've said it before, and I'll say it again...my kids have the worst immune systems EVER. And they certainly didn't get that from me! ~cough~

I'm off to stock up on orange juice and chicken noodle soup.

School Stuff

2011-08-27T09:12:00.001-05:00

I have been away from this blog for way too long...but school this is year is making SO.DARN.TIRED!!!

I don't know if it is the added responsibility of having two in school this year, or if I was just way too lazy this summer, but every night has seen me ready for sleep by 9:00.

Charlie, for the most part, is loving Kindergarten.

Here he is with his new teacher this year. I think he is learning a lot already! He loves art class, library, and math, but was horrified to discover he has to go to music classes. After he went to music the first time, he told me "Mom, can you believe this school wants to teach me how to sing?!!" He is also not a fan of the After School Care program that he goes to for about half an hour after school until I can pick him up. Hopefully as he gets used to the routine, this will get better. Evan was a good big brother and went with him to After School Care the whole second week of school just so Charlie could feel more comfortable. I love it when they love each other!!

My class is awesome this year! They are already so well behaved and eager to learn that it has been fun to go to work everyday. I also have a student teacher for the first time, and that has been so much fun! She is already an outstanding teacher, and I am learning a lot from her.

Evan is not loving Junior High, which makes me sad, but when I think back on it, I don't know many people who do. I can't think of one person who says "I would do anything to go back to Junior High!" It is such an awkward stage of life. I suppose it is something we all just have to get through. Having him be a grump everyday after school has been a little tiring.

I became an Aunt again this week when my sister had her 4th...little Leo John. It was exciting to meet him last night. One of my favorite friends at school had her baby not even 24 hours after my sister, so it has been raining babies this week! Unfortunately for Jeff, I now have some major baby fever. Sadly, we are done adding to our family, so I am concentrating on my three awesome boys who keep me hopping...such as when Sammy threw a major fit before school yesterday when he didn't like the clothes I picked out for him for school pictures. He told me "Mom, you just don't know ANYTHING about good clothes!" Holy cow! From my 4 year old BOY! He is such a fashionista!! I don't know what we'll do when he has to wear a uniform to school next year!

Back to Work

2011-08-08T21:16:00.002-05:00

Today was Sammy's first day back to preschool. (I can NOT believe this is his last year! My baby is growing up way too fast!!) I love, love, love that all of Sammy's back to school pictures have included his faithful stuffed best friend Lammie. My Mom and Dad brought Lammie back with them from Ireland when Sammy was one. Lammie has gone EVERYWHERE with us ever since. Sammy has never been to school without him, he comes on vacation, and rides in the car. If Sammy is there, so is Lammie. I think one of the hardest parts of Kindergarten next year will be leaving Lammie behind.

Aspen loves to get in on a good picture too, and usually tries to shove his way in when I am posing the boys. I love this dog. He is the perfect addition to our family.

Work was okay. 5:30 came way too early on the alarm, that's for sure. Charlie wasn't too impressed with the After School Care program, and he managed to loose his glasses by 10:30 in the morning. After a hunt on the playground, we found them abandoned on a nearby bench. It will be a miracle if those glasses make it to the first day of Kindergarten.

The worst part of the first day back to school is that you have to get up and do it all again the next day. Somehow, day 2 is always worse.

I'm already looking forward to the weekend!

My Classroom

2011-08-03T09:50:00.001-05:00

My awesome husband took Monday and Tuesday off from work so that I could go up to school for two days without the kids to put my classroom back together. This task is the worst of the whole school year for many teachers.

At the end of every school year, you are required to take everything off the walls and pile the furniture into a ginormous pile at one end of the room. Why? Supposedly so that the custodial staff can clean carpets and do repairs. All of this means that when I first enter my classroom at the beginning of the year, it looks like this:

Most people assume that teachers are given ample time to put their room together during the week teachers are back but students haven't yet returned to school. WRONG WRONG WRONG! That week is so packed full of meetings you can hardly remember your own name as you run around from one thing to another. I always go up to school for two days the first week in August to get things started.

Lucky me...on Monday when I was there to move this furniture mess the outside temp was 105 degrees...AND THE AIR CONDITIONING WAS BROKEN AT SCHOOL. Fun times!! I knew since Jeff had taken the day off I couldn't give up and go home. So, I shoved and pushed and hauled (and sweated my brains out) until the room looked like this:

Let me tell you...moving filing cabinets and a teachers desk are not easy. I have no idea how I will do this job when I am 60.

I worked all day on Monday and Tuesday, and am so relieved that my classroom now looks like this:

The math calendar/class meeting area.

This is my desk area. To the left is the desk my student teacher will use this semester


On the right (with the big table) is my small group area, where I will meet with reading and math groups. On the left is our cozy book corner, where kids will spend time curled up with a good book.

This is a view of the front of the room. The thing with the pink sheet over it is our computerized chalkboard called an ActivBoard. I don't ever use chalk anymore!!

A view of the student desks. I always have 30 kids in my room, so the desks take up a lot of space. I am going to start the year with this horse shoe formation, but later I will group them into groups of 5 desks in a pod.

Back to School Crazies

2011-07-30T09:37:00.000-05:00

We have been busy this week. Busy as in the back to school crazies. This week we got Charlie and Evan squared away on uniforms and school supplies. Having two kids to get ready for school this year was a LOT more work that just one. Charlie is super excited about Kindergarten though, so it was fun to see all of the preparations through his eyes. He just shone with excitement when he saw himself in his uniform for the first time. He had a blast picking out every green school supply he could find. (Apparently green is his new favorite color).

It never fails that every summer around this time I start my back to school nightmares. Dreams where I am trying to set up my classroom, and my class suddenly appears out of nowhere and the room is a disaster. Or sometimes I dream I get lost on the way to school the first day. Or that I make it to school but can't seem to find my classroom. I think I have anxiety dreams about going back to school because I have such a hard time saying good bye to summer. I absolutely love being home with my kids. I love having the time I need to focus on our home and daily chores. I love not having a frantic schedule. Besides our financial need for me to work, teaching for me is more than a job. I truly feel like it is a calling from God. I know I wouldn't be fulfilling my mission here on earth if I wasn't teaching kids to read.

Monday and Tuesday I will be setting up my classroom, and I know I will feel better after that. Having that monumental task under my belt always makes me feel better. I wonder if the students and parents realize that most teachers are just as nervous as the kids on the first day of school ? :)

Splish Splash

2011-07-15T22:52:00.001-05:00

I am sad it took me half the summer to accomplish this, but I am so glad this is ready for us to enjoy!

It's just one of those above ground pools, but we have wanted one for years. It took Evan and I 3 1/2 hours to put it together, and at several points it took all the patience I possessed to not swear a blue streak in front of Evan's young ears. The pool box boasted it would be "Easy as 1, 2, 3!" to put together. WRONG! But I had a bee in my bonnet, and I was determined to do try to complete it myself. I hate having to wait for other people to help me do things. Jeff and I aren't the handiest of people with tools and projects, and I have to ask my brother for help quite a bit. I don't want to overburden him, so I am always tickled with myself when I can do things without help. I proudly texted this picture to my brother and let him know he was off the hook tomorrow.

The boys took their maiden swim this afternoon and loved it. We are expecting temps this week over 100 degrees, so hopefully this will help us stay cool.

Finished!

2011-07-14T09:07:00.001-05:00

This took me 6 days last week, but I am SO glad that I can cross this off my summer to do list. I was even more glad I painted when Charlie announced, "This is the best room I have ever seen in my whole entire life!" Here is the finished product:

I learned that perfectionists like me should not paint stripes. I could have stood there and fiddled with the tape making these stripes perfect for days! There are a few places where the edges aren't as crisp as I would like, but as my husband keeps telling me, "It doesn't have to be perfect!"

I got rid of their book case and a toy shelf I didn't like in favor of this shelf shown above. I love the fabric drawers and how they match the stripes. It seems to work for the boys too, as it has been a lot easier for them to keep their room clean with this system.

I am taking a break this week, and then on to the master bathroom next week!

Wow...

2011-07-12T17:07:00.000-05:00

Just popping in for a minute to share this great site with you:

About One

Have you heard of About One? If there's one thing I love, it's organization, and this offers a new amazing way to help organized your life. I am IMPRESSED!

Check it out!

Birthday Fun

2011-07-08T07:44:00.003-05:00

I had a great day yesterday...I couldn't ask for a better birthday. We made progress on the patio:

I got three walls painted with a double coat in Charlie and Sammy's room, and (miracle of miracles!) my dryer is fixed and working. I also got to spend time with my family, which is the best gift of all. My Mom took Charlie and Sammy to a movie in the afternoon to keep them out of the paint in their bedroom, so I got to visit with her for awhile. For dinner, I made all my favorites (totally unhealthy): fried chicken, mashed potatoes and gravy, green beans, and homemade rolls.

I love making a feast for my crew. It was a fun dinner. Jeff brought home an ice cream cake, so we had a great desert as well!

Not a bad start to 34.

Today is my Birthday!

2011-07-07T08:49:00.000-05:00

One of my favorite parts about me is that my birthday is 7-7-77. There just isn't a cooler birthday. My Mom wanted me to be born on the 4th of July. Not me! I LOVE my birthday date.

I am celebrating today with home improvement projects. A repair man is coming to repair the dryer (thank the Lord!!!), men are digging out my patio in the backyard as we speak, and I am painting the boys room.

I am going to make some time in the afternoon to make myself a fried chicken dinner...mmmmm! Hopefully tonight, there will also be time for a glass of wine, and maybe an episode of Big Love (I have become addicted to this silly show!)

Here's to a great year of being 34!

Good-Bye Nursery

2011-07-07T07:00:00.000-05:00

In November 2006, just before I delivered Sam, my Dad painted and wall papered the baby's room with adorable little frog princes and a calming light green color. You can see our newly finished nursery with double cribs here. (Gosh this brings back memories...seeing those two cribs together. It was so surreal to tuck in my two tiny babies, only 10 months and 10 days apart. Having Irish twins is not for the faint of heart.)

A couple of months ago, I noticed a small hole had appeared in the wallpaper. As the hole got bigger over the coming weeks, I knew it was a sign that it was time to update Charlie and Sammy's room. It made my heart hurt. I'm sad to say goodbye to the nursery, small toddler stage. My boys are growing up, and ready for something a little more "boyish" instead of babyish in their bedroom. I was also dreading having to redo something in the house that my Dad had done for me. Having that wallpaper in the room was a visual reminder of his love for me and for his grandchildren.

Yesterday I bit the bullet. I took pictures beforehand to remember the room by, and then I told myself that my Dad's love wasn't just put on the walls, it was poured into my heart. And no matter how the walls look, my Dad still loves me. I also reminded myself that a hole in the wallpaper would have driven him nuts, and he would have wanted me to get this makeover on the road.

Over the years the room has changed a bit...like Charlie's addition of his "art wall". He loves to color, and insists on decorating our walls with his creations.

We added bunk beds in 2008. You may notice that on these two walls the border is missing. Putting Charlie in the top bunk allowed him access to the border as a toddler, and one day while having a temper tantrum, he ripped the whole thing off. One of the times as a mother I have been most angry.

Yesterday I took down all the wallpaper, scrubbed the glue off the walls, and repaired wall dings. We are off to get paint today, and soon we will start the transformation. But there is one thing I won't change. Whenever my dad would wallpaper or put up a border in a room, he would take a small square and put it on the light switch. It added a creative touch to the room, and one that said "Dad" to me. And so, even though it won't match, this will be staying just the way it is in their room. A little piece of Poppo to hold on to.

I'll post some pictures when I'm done. I hope the boys like it!

Pine Beach

2011-07-06T07:00:00.002-05:00

We spent a beautiful week in the North Woods of Minnesota last week. It's my favorite place on Earth, and a week of heaven for me. The weather there is gorgeous, and it usually isn't here in Nebraska. Omaha summers include many days over 90 with LOTS of high humidity. Northern Minnesota offers days pleasantly warm enough for swimming, but cool evenings and nights, and rarely any humidity.

We stay at a resort right on the lake called Pine Beach. This year, we took my Mom and brother, as well as my Aunt Connie and Uncle Dave. We all stayed in one big cabin, which was really nice. It was fun to be together in the evenings after dinner. I love having no electronics. It makes it easy to spend time as a family. After dinner each night we played Canasta, and talked and talked. There is something healing and wonderful about having long talks with the women in your family. It grounds you, and gives you a perspective of where you came from.

Uncle Dave was the boat captain this year. He did a great job taking us around the lake, and Charlie and Sammy even got a turn to drive.

Jeff's favorite part is the swimming. I love that the deck on each cabin leads to your own stretch of beach and the water.

On Tuesday, Mom and Connie and I headed out for a girls day. We visited a winery, had lunch in Park Rapids, and had pedicures. It was so relaxing. Even though we have been there four times now, we always find something new to do in the area.

Mom brought along her "Sorry!" game (which Sammy and Charlie have just mastered) and they spent time playing with Grandma each afternoon. It's so important to me that my kids have opportunities to spend extended time with their grandparents. I am so glad that I made an effort for my kids to be with my Dad before he died.

One thing we didn't do this year was play Shuffleboard. My Dad and I loved playing this game together last year, and it just didn't feel right to play. Maybe someday, but not yet. In fact, I didn't even walk over to that part of the resort. I didn't even want to see it. (Aunt Connie took this picture).

The trip was so relaxing, and healing in many ways. We had a chance to talk and to remember my Dad. I'm so glad we went, spent time together, and had fun with the kids.

**All pictures used in this post were taken by my Aunt Connie Bridges (who is a much better photographer than I am :)

Brotherly Love

2011-07-05T07:00:00.001-05:00

The best part of my 4th of July was this:

Could they be any cuter?! I love that these two love each other. They melt my heart!

The View from My Deck

2011-07-04T16:52:00.001-05:00

...is not about fireworks this weekend :) Instead, it looks like this:

We returned on Saturday from a wonderful week long vacation at a lake in my favorite state, Minnesota. We had a fabulous time, and enjoyed scenes like this:

right from our deck. (More about our trip tomorrow!) Unfortunately, I came home to a broken dryer, and piles and piles of wet, smelly lake laundry. I knew I couldn't let it sit, so we've been drying on the deck. Even more unfortunately, it's a holiday weekend so it will be late in the week before the dryer is fixed, and our neighborhood doesn't allow clothes lines. So we improvised. Luckily, our laundry is no match for the hot Nebraska sun and heat. Clothes are dry in no time!

Also, don't forget, our next session of Bible in 90 Days starts on Monday, July 11th. Follow this link to sign up! I would love to have you join me! I am reading through for the 3rd time, and am also serving as a mentor.

Happy 4th of July! I hope yours is filled with fireworks and fun, instead of laundry like mine!

Summer session registration is now OPEN!

2011-06-22T08:36:00.000-05:00

I would highly encourage you to do this program! Registration is now open at Mom's Toolbox for the next session of the Bible in 90 Days program. I am going to be serving as a mentor for my second time, and I will be reading through the Bible, cover to cover, for the third time. I can't WAIT to get started! I hope you will prayerfully choose to join me!

http://www.momstoolbox.com/blog/2011/06/21/bible-in-90-days-sign-up/

Happy Father's Day

2011-06-19T10:23:00.000-05:00

I am so blessed to call this man my Father. I miss him every single day. I wish he was here so that I could tell him in person, but I am sending lots of love and appreciation to heaven today. I love you to the moon and back Daddy, and I always will. I am the luckiest girl to be able to say I am your daughter.

Daddy walking me down the aisle at my wedding

Dad with the grand kids on Christmas Eve

Elusive Weightloss

2011-06-09T09:46:00.001-05:00

At the beginning of the summer, I set a goal for myself. I was really going to amp up my exercise routine, and watch carefully what I ate. My main goals were to raise my HDL cholesterol level through cardiac exercise, and to slowly start loosing weight.

My plan? I have been running 3 miles a day, 5 days a week. I have been doing some light weight lifting. I have been really limiting my calories and fat intake.

The results? I have GAINED 3.5 pounds.

That's right. I GAINED WEIGHT. It is really difficult to keep up such a strenuous routine when it has absolutely no results. Do you suppose there is something wrong with me?

The only positive has been that I do feel stronger, and my endurance is getting much better. However, I really don't want to gain more weight. I am going to keep it up for a couple more weeks to see if I might be the only person on earth who actually gains weight from exercising.

Rhubarb!

2011-06-01T08:36:00.000-05:00

This year we joined a CSA for the first time. (CSA stands for Community Supported Agriculture~for about $20 a week we get to go to a local delivery spot and pickup a huge sack full of eggs, bread, cheese, fruit, and vegetables straight from the farm, all grown organically.) Yesterday, was our first delivery, and BOY! were we excited! It was full of delicious things, and one perplexing thing...rhubarb. I've never been a rhubarb fan. I've only had it in pie though, and I think it was the texture that bothered me more than the taste. I was determined to turn our pile of rhubarb into something my family would like. I searched online and found a recipe for rhubarb muffins.

These are absolutely delicious...even my boys love them and had 2 apiece for breakfast this morning (and they can be pretty picky!)

Cinnamon Topped Rhubarb Muffins

Ingredients:

1/2 cup brown sugar, firmly packed
1/4 cup butter
1 (8oz) cup sour cream
2 eggs
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
3/4 tea baking soda
1/2 tea cinnamon
1 1/2 cups chopped rhubarb
1 tbs sugar
1/2 tea cinnamon

Directions:

Heat oven to 375 F. in large bowl combine brown sugar and butter. beat at medium speed until well mixed (1-2 min). Add sour cream and eggs; continue beating ; scraping bowl often, until well mixed (1-2 min) in medium bowl. stir together flour baking soda and 1/2 tea cinnamon. By hand, stir flour mixture into sour cream mixture just until moistened. Fold in rhubarb. Spoon into greased muffin pans. in small bowl stir together 1 tbs sugar and 1/2 tea cinnamon, sprinkle onto each muffin. bake for 25 to 30 min or until lightly browned. cool 10 min; remove from pans.

Recipe from: http://www.rhubarbinfo.com/recipes

My Dad's Legacy, in the Form of a Sink

2011-05-29T18:38:00.001-05:00

My Dad was always helping people. He helped his brothers and sisters to paint their houses, move into new houses, and do home/car repair. He helped his friends with the same. He helped his department at work build frames for their entry into the Sand in the City competition. Anything anybody needed, he would do. He built me shelves in my storage room, painted my living room and kitchen, and he put in our wood floor. When his parents were still alive, he did their bills and went to their house every Saturday to mow the grass and give my Grandpa a shower.

He taught us through his example. He taught his children to always serve others, and put others first.

I see so much of my Dad in my brother Creighton. I saw it this Friday when Creighton and my brother in law Luke came over and installed this beauty in my kitchen:

I am sure I have complained about my old kitchen sink here before...it was only 6 inches deep, and did not include a sprayer. I lived for FIVE STINKIN' YEARS without a sprayer in my kitchen!! Have you ever tried to clean up after Thanksgiving dinner with a 6 inch sink and no sprayer? IT IS NOT FUN. So now, I am loving doing dishes with my 9 1/2 inch deep sink, and it's beautiful, wonderful sprayer. Best of all though, I got to see a piece of my Dad when Creighton volunteered to help me with this project after hearing me curse the old one. I love that my parents worked hard to create a family that loves and helps each other.

And fittingly for Memorial Day weekend, yesterday at church we saw that this plaque had been installed at the foot of a tree planted in memorial to my dad:

It's comforting to know there is this piece of comfort at a place that is so important to us.

Charlie: Class of 2011

2011-05-26T17:47:00.002-05:00

Yesterday afternoon, my baby Charlie graduated from preschool. My baby who has somehow morphed into a precocious five and a half year old.

He was adorable and proud as he received his diploma. But I think occasions and rights of passage such as these are always bitter sweet for us mothers. I love watching him grow and develop into the person God created him to be. At the same time, I yearn for the small chubby baby I rocked to sleep in the wee hours of the morning.

There were only 4 graduates in his class. I am anxious and excited to see how he will make the transition to 90 Kindergarten classmates.

I am beyond thankful for the women who nurtured my baby the past 5 years during the times when I had to be away. They have been a gift!

And now? We are off to enjoy the magical days of summer.

Oh blog...how I've missed you!

2011-05-22T09:17:00.000-05:00

This spring has been crazy busy for us. It's meant I have been kept busy keeping my family going, with precious little time to sit at the computer and record my thoughts. I am excited to see summer at my doorstep (we have our last day of school this Wednesday!! WOOOHOO!!) when I will have time to catch up here at the Sole Woman, on the house, and with my kids.

April was a month of drastic changes for my family. On April 2nd, my wonderful Grandma Rose passed away. She was just short of 90 years young. She was miserable at the end, and was dealing with congestive heart failure, so in some ways her passing was a blessing. I am filled with happiness to know she is once again with my Grandpa, her parents, and her brothers and sisters. After loosing my Dad, I have a different perspective on death. Death is so hard on those of us left behind, but I have a new respect for the joy they must be feeling in heaven with Jesus. In many ways, I don't know if I've been truly able to process her death. I am still feeling pretty numb from Dad's death. Her funeral and the events around it were a little too much to deal with at the time.

Two weeks later, on April 16th, my little brother Creighton married the love of his life, Lindsey.

It was a perfect day and a perfect ceremony. I love them both beyond measure, and I am so excited Lindsey is my official sister. I've felt that she has been for awhile, so it was nice to make it official formally true.

The combined effect of the funeral and wedding plus Easter the next weekend all made us feel like we were a bit bipolar and having massive mood swings. We are all looking forward to a little down time, and some recovery time.

Looking forward to seeing my blog on a regular basis!

Some news..

2011-04-21T08:50:00.000-05:00

Hello everyone! It has been WAY too long since my last post, and I have so much news to tell you! For now though, I have to tell you about a new project I am working on.

On May 21, I will be walking in the American Heart Associations Heart Walk to honor the life of my Dad, and also for one of my students Abby. Abby is actually the Heart Child of the year, and will be starting both the children's walk and the adult walk. Abby has overcome multiple heart defects to become on of the most amazing young ladies I have ever had the pleasure of meeting!

I would be so honored if you would visit here:
http://omahaheartwalk.kintera.org/christykleffman
to help me make my dream a reality, and to help make a difference in the lives of those dealing with heart problems.

It makes me feel happy to know that there is something I can do to honor my father, and to help make sure other families don't have to experience the pain of loosing a loved one to heart disease.

Spring

2011-03-22T20:29:00.000-05:00

I am not usually one who is depressed by winter. I mean, what teacher doesn't love a good snow day, right? I don't mind snow much, mostly because I don't often have to drive to work in it. Instead it usually means cozy days snuggled under blankets, a fire in the fireplace, and baking cookies with my boys. Most years I don't mind waiting patiently for spring. As a Nebraskan, this serves me well, as spring can often take it's own sweet time in arriving.

This year feels different. I am very anxious for warm weather and sunny skies. The stark snow and barren landscapes of winter have seemed too close to my own emotional outlook this year, and have felt oppressive. I think I am hoping that the cheery sound of chirping birds, sunny skies, and warm breezes can help transport me out of this season of grief.

I am learning that grief doesn't go away. I thought at first it might. The sharpness of it will dull with time, but it never leaves. We are all adjusting to our new roles in life, the altered picture of our family. I don't know if it will ever feel normal, or okay, but it is becoming less "new". I am learning to deal with it, but it was somewhat of a surprise to me that everyday still brings tears. Every single day. I don't know if that will ever change. And I guess if it doesn't, you just learn to keep going.

I am hoping the arrival of a new season, the season of new life, will help breathe new life into my heart. I am feeling ready for some happy and some sunshine. I know my Dad wants that for us to.

My Girls

2011-03-21T07:11:00.000-05:00

We had a wedding shower on Saturday for my brother Creighton's fiance Lindsey. It was so much fun to spoil her and see family and friends! My Aunt Connie took this awesome picture of my sister Sarah, me, and Lindsey. I love it! I also love that Lindsey is now an official member of the family. I tell Creighton all the time that if I could choose anyone to join our family, it would be Lindsey. She is wonderful, and we are so lucky.

My niece Brooke is in the corner. Besides my Mom, we are the ONLY girls in our family! Can you believe it? Sarah is currently pregnant with the 6th grandson for my parents.

I hope Lindsey's future includes some girl babies for us to love!

My Cuite Bug

2011-03-20T10:17:00.000-05:00

Isn't he just stinkin' adorable?!

When he put them on for the first time at the eye doctor, he looked around for a minute, gasped, and said, "Oh Mommy! It's beautiful! I can see so much STUFF! And hey! Did you know there's a Taco Bell across the street? I've never seen that before!" It was precious. I am amazed at how well he functioned without them. It makes me sad that we didn't notice he needed them sooner!

Later that night, Sammy had swimming lessons. After I had given him a shower in the locker room, I put his glasses back on. He looked down at the floor and exclaimed, "OH MY GOODNESS! There is all kinds of yucky dirt on this floor! Why didn't anybody tell me about this?" Oh the details you can see with your glasses on!! Everyday since has brought new discoveries for Sammy, now that he can finally see the world around him,

Sammy's Getting Glasses!

2011-03-08T07:34:00.000-06:00

Sammy and Evan have had a busy 2011. They've been busy making lots of medical bills! :)

In January, you might remember that Sam had his run in with the toybox and got 7 stitches. In February, we took him to the eye doctor after he failed his eye check at his 4 year check up. We found out he is slightly near sighted, but more importantly has a rather severe astigmatism, which makes everything extremely blurry for him. Ever since, we've been trying to get glasses ordered for him. My adorable Sammy has the BIGGEST blue eyes you've ever seen. But apparently they are so big it means that we need to have glasses custom made in order to fit his face. I think we may finally have a pair we can order this week.

Evan, meanwhile, has been making many trips to the orthodontist so that we could have an evaluation done. We discovered that his bottom jaw is bigger than the top jaw, making it impossible for him to chew on his molars. As he begins to grow, the problem is going to get worse, and eventually he won't even be able to chew with his front teeth. The problem is genetic, and we were lucky enough to have the orthodontist tell us it's the worst case he's ever seen. Awesome! So for now, Evan is going to have braces put on for the next year to make a temporary fix that will allow him to chew for the next few years. When he stops growing at 16 or 17, he will need more orthodontics, and jaw surgery where they will remove a significant portion of the jaw bone and reshape his bite.

I don't know how I managed it, but I think I have passed on the absolute worst of my genetics to my poor kiddos. Thank goodness we live in a time where there are ways to fix and deal with these things! Now I just have to pray my poor husband doesn't collapse at the thought of all our medical bills :).

My Kids Ate My Blog

2011-03-07T10:08:00.002-06:00

I can't believe I haven't been here since January.

I love my blog, but my life? It likes me to stay SUPER busy. You know the story...work, drive kids around to activities, doctor appointments, homework, drive kids around to more activities, try to keep the house clean. So I won't bore you with the details.

Today I am home with a sick Sammy Bear. He has a fever, aches, headache, and a deep wet cough. My guess is the flu, so we are off to the doctor this morning. With the boys' asthma, we don't mess around with lung issues/infections.

All of which has left me some time to write while my baby is snuggled up next to me, sweating his way through his fever. We have some exciting things happening around here I would love to tell you about!

My brother is getting married in 6 short weeks, which has provided us with a flurry of wedding activity! We've been busy making 600 mints, addressing invitations, picking out dresses, and getting fitted for tuxes. Speaking of dresses, my bridesmaid dress came in yesterday. When I tried it on, we discovered it was fine in the waist but would barely zip around my rib cage. So, I will be getting a few ribs removed so that I can zip my dress and not pass out from lack of oxygen at the ceremony.

Just kidding. But I do hope the seamstress can work miracles, or I will have to give up breathing for the day.

Charlie is getting geared up for Kindergarten round up on April 1st. He is SO excited and SO nervous. Every day he is full of questions like, "What if my teacher is mean?" "What if I don't like it?" "What if I don't know everything they teach me?" I remember feeling the same way. Poor baby.

I am counting down the days to summer. I have vowed to NOT sign the kids up for anything other than once a week swim lessons. We need some healing of hearts and minds around here, and I think some time to slow down and relax is just the thing.

We are in the depths of tax season, which means that my poor Jeff is working so hard. I am so grateful he is such a good provider for our family. I love that he has such a wonderful work ethic. But I do worry about him this time of year. I am praying he stays healthy, and that the stress doesn't adversely affect him. And I miss him terribly. I just can't get my fill of that guy. Have I mentioned lately that I love my husband?

Me? I've been getting by. Every day includes a moment where I am hit by a wave of loneliness and sadness for my Dad. I've learned to let it wash over me, and to pray pray pray. I am trying to focus on strengthening my relationship with the Lord to get me through. My church choir is one of the high points of my week. The singing helps brighten my week and my soul. I'm so glad I have music to turn to. I've also put pictures and sayings about my Dad all over my house. It helps me to see his face everyday, and to send him a message to heaven that I love him.

Thank goodness spring is on the way! I am dreaming of birds tweeting, warm sunshine, and planting some flowers in my yard. Only a few more weeks....

Birthdays and Other News

2011-01-17T17:19:00.000-06:00

Boy, did we have a crazy weekend.

On Sunday, the dog got out of the yard, and I ended up having to chase him like the marathon runner I am NOT. That crafty dog kept looking over his shoulder to make sure I was still behind him. I think Aspen was having the time of his life, and thought he had invented a grand game for us to play! He is lucky that I love him, and that I have been running on the treadmill, or there is no way I would have kept up with him. Luckily for me, he got distracted by a pile of dog "doodoo" that he needed to sniff, or I don't know what I would have done.

This all happened as we were supposed to be leaving for my nephew Colin's birthday party. We were late to the party, and had only been there for about an hour when disaster struck again. Sammy and the other cousins had already finished eating, so they went into the basement to play. Somehow, Sammy tripped, fell, and face planted right on top of a toy box. He took a chunk out of his cheek, and we had to take him to the emergency room. He needed 7 stitches on the top layer, and some underneath. I have never seen so much blood! He also severely bit the inside of his cheek, so eating has been a challenge today. I don't know if you can tell in the picture below, but his cheek is so swollen it looks like he has an apple stuffed in his mouth.

My poor Sammy bear! He was impressed he got to watch Toy Story at the hospital, and he was so, SO brave. He didn't make a peep while they were stitching him up, and he held so still. I am so proud of him!

And today? Today is my Charlie's birthday. It was 5 years ago that this 10 pound, 23 1/2 inch bundle of joy was placed in my arms:

And here is me, shortly before I was ready to push Charlie into the world. I love how Charlie and I were both so surrounded by love and family and friends that day. My parents were both in the room to see each of my children enter the world, and I am so thankful.

I love that my Dad is holding my hand in this picture. I love that I had the most important men in my life holding my hands as I met my new little man for the first time.

Sometimes I miss Daddy so much it steals my breath away. Today is one of those days.

I am thankful that God has given me Charlie, and that he is 5 today. He is so spirited, and creative, and amazingly smart. Sometimes it steals my breath away that I am lucky enough to be his mom. And today is one of those days.

Despite the craziness, the stitches and blood, the sorrows, and the hard work that goes into my life, I am thankful. And so blessed. So very blessed.

SNOW DAY!

2011-01-10T08:59:00.000-06:00

Good morning! It is the happiest of days in a teacher's life this morning! We are having a SNOW DAY here at the Sole Woman. It's been snowing since yesterday morning, and we have about 6 inches on the ground-and it is still going strong! Here's a picture I took this morning with a new photo program I am playing around with on my iPhone (I love the old fashioned feel it gives photos):

I am sitting with my coffee, looking at the snow falling quietly outside the window. My family is all tucked inside, warm and safe. Jeff is working from home today, Evan is taking advantage of his day off by sleeping (he is SO 12!!), and Charlie and Sammy are snuggled up on the couch under blankets talking about what they will be doing outside later today.

Bliss!

Since I have nowhere to go and nothing to do but enjoy my coffee, I thought I would give you an update of life around our house. I forgot to mention that my darling husband bought me for Christmas the gift I have been dreaming of for the last 8 years....drumroll please....a KitchenAid mixer!! (And she is a beautiful cherry red too!) I guess I haven't talked about it a lot here, but I love to bake. I love to do things homemade. My go to stress reliever is bread baking, much to the delight of my husband. I think he secretly loves it when I have a bad day, because he knows there is a loaf of fresh baked bread in his future. Since I first moved into my own space, I have been using my mom's cast off mixer, which was a gift from her 1974 wedding. About 6 months ago, he lost a leg, and I had to prop it up on a piece of wood so it wouldn't wobble while I mixed. The thing drove me bananas. If the recipe called for more than 3 cups of flour, the batter would climb up the beaters and try and get into the motor. It was beyond frustrating to try and mix up dough for Christmas cookies.

I will admit that I screamed when I opened it on Christmas morning. I love it. Seriously. I am not one to keep appliance on the kitchen counters, but I love my mixer so much, she has a place of honor on the counter. (And besides, she's red! So she coordinates with my kitchen!!) I have been trying out lots of new recipes, and I have been playing around with made from scratch cakes. Do any of you have any recipes for homemade cakes? Or tips? Mine haven't been the greatest.

This week I had to submit all of Charlie's documents and paperwork for Kindergarten registration. It's really starting to hit home that he's going to school next year. I know every mother feels like their kids grow up too fast, but it is UNBELIEVABLE to me how quickly his first 5 years have gone. In fact, he is turning 5 on the 17th, and he is beyond excited. I know he's ready for this new adventure, so I am trying to get my heart to accept this.

I am off to bake some bread! (Not because I am stressed today :) Just because it sounds nice!) I hope you are warm and cozy on this January Monday.

Back to the Grind!

2011-01-03T16:50:00.000-06:00

I went back to work today, after a lovely and much needed two weeks off. I needed the sleep, I needed the down time, and I needed the family time. It's been a long first semester, and I definitely needed the recharge. Although I wasn't overly excited this morning about returning to work when the alarm went off at 5:30, the day was nice. No students today, just a work day to get things done in our classrooms, and I feel ready again to tackle some school work.

Having a routine is good for me and the kids. I am feeling ready to get started on 2011, and make a fresh go of things.

Now I just have to convince the boys of this! Charlie had a huge temper tantrum before we left about how much he hates school, how bored his there, and how he absolutely would NOT be getting his shoes on, thank you very much! Ever since we got home this afternoon, Evan has alternated between moping and wailing about how much he shouldn't be required to go to school, he already knows everything he needs to know in life. The stubborn/ dramatic gene? It runs strongly in this family.

As for me, I am going to try and stay positive, stay relaxed, and remember my New Year's goal of realizing I am NOT super mom, and I don't have to be either. I hope you have a great week!

It's Not too Late to Sign Up!

2011-01-01T15:48:00.000-06:00

The new session of the Bible in 90 Days at Mom's Toolbox begins this Monday! It's not too late to sign up. I will be mentoring a group this session and would love to have you join me.

For more information, please click here.

Wouldn't this be a great way to start 2011 off right? HAPPY NEW YEAR!

The best gift I've given this Christmas season...

2010-12-31T10:18:00.000-06:00

Just popping in to tell you about this GREAT cause, this WONDERFUL little boy with Down's Syndrome who YOU can help, just like I did.

His name is Cliff, and he is alone in an orphanage in Eastern Europe. A blogger named Janette is helping to raise money for Cliff's adoption grant fund, so that when he finds his forever family, their expenses will be paid for.

Please read about him here.

Won't you join me in helping him?

Good Bye 2010

2010-12-31T09:26:00.000-06:00

I have very mixed feelings about the departure of 2010. It was far and above the WORST year of my life. It did bring the arrival of my nephew Grant, but this was it's only redeeming quality. August 2010 included my Dad's disastrous surgery. The next 8 weeks held a miserable struggle for him as he worked to heal and recover. (Although it was so hard to watch him be so uncomfortable and in pain, I will be forever thankful for this extra time I had to tell him how much I loved him.) And of course, September brought his death, an event I don't know if I will ever really recover from.

For these reasons I am not sorry to see 2010 go. 2011 has to be better, right?

On the other hand, this is the last year that held my Dad's presence in my life in a physical way. I am so scared to leave that behind and face a whole year without him.

I spent some time this morning looking back at my 2010 goals that I set back on January 1st. They included home sanctuary, health, and relationships. I am going to stick with these again this year, as I don't feel like I did a very good job at most of it. Sanctuary is definitely the hardest for me. This year brought a change in schedule for us, as all three boys became old enough to become involved in activities. Although I limited the boys to one activity each, it still made our evenings after school crazy! This has made for my most difficult year trying to balance work, family time, and household tasks. It left me with precious little time for working to make our home a clean and relaxing space. This is a whole post in itself, but I really feel sometimes that women got a raw deal from the feminist movement of the 60s. Sure we can have better paying jobs, but this created an economic situation where most women need to have jobs to support their families. Now we have full time jobs on top of all the responsibilities that women have always had....raising the kids and managing the household. It's like having three or four full time jobs at once. And I am standing here in front of you admitting I am not very good at handling and balancing all of that.

Anyway, I'll get off my soapbox now. I am going to keep trying in 2011 to achieve balance, and find time to create sanctuary.

I learned a lot in the relationship area this year. I learned you never know when you won't get to see someone again. I told my Dad in his birthday card that our experience with his surgery taught me to never waste an opportunity to say I love you, to give a hug, or to appreciate. I am going to work hard to never forget this, and carry this forward into 2011 and beyond.

Health also took on a new perspective as my siblings and I all realized the genetic woes that are stacked against us. I found out I am in a dangerously high risk group for heart attack with my high cholesterol problems and genetic history. I got a treadmill, and changed my diet even further. I finally, finally, finally lost 10 pounds. I am hoping for more in the coming year.

I'm going to keep plugging away at these goals this year, and I'm going to forgive myself for not being perfect at achieving them last year. I am working every day to remember it's okay to be human and not super woman.

I hope all of you have a wonderful New Year's Eve tonight, and more importantly a wonderful 2011! Thanks for spending some of your time (which I know is precious!) to be with me here at The Sole Woman. You are part of what makes the adventure fun for me.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Merry Christmas!

2010-12-26T18:51:00.004-06:00

I can't believe another Christmas Day has passed, in the blink of an eye. I am sad to see it go...I love the holiday season so much! We had a wonderful day yesterday, filled with:

Brotherly Love

Handsome boys ready for church on Christmas Eve (with Evan singing in the choir!)

New family members

Celebrating Christmas Eve at my Mom's house... It was nice to be together, but also much harder than I thought it would be without Dad there. It was so hard to not have him with us, but we made it through one more "first". We made it through together, as a family.

More new family members...this is Lindsey, my brother's infinitely awesome girlfriend. She feels like she has been my sister forever. There are so many things that make her fit into our family perfectly, and it feels like God sent her to us as a gift.

Christmas morning Christmas Trees...

Boys ready to open gifts

...and Hot cocoa and Christmas cookies for breakfast

It was a good holiday, and we felt surrounded by family and love. If you celebrated Christmas yesterday as well, I hope that you had a wonderful day! I count all of you that come here to read my little corner of the blogosphere as one of my Christmas blessings. THANK YOU for spending time with me here at the Sole Woman!

Happy Anniversary

2010-12-21T18:12:00.003-06:00

Today would have been my parent's 36th wedding anniversary.

I have been thinking about my Dad, and my parent's marriage all day long. One of the biggest blessings that God has given me is my parent's example of marriage. My Dad and Mom were always loving and kind to each other. I can only remember them arguing in front of us kids once when I was growing up. This doesn't mean they didn't have differing opinions, but they were so respectful and kind to each other when they did.

My Dad always spoiled my Mom on special days like birthdays and anniversaries, but he did special things for her in the everyday moments too. He provided me with a wonderful example of what a husband can be, should be, and needs to be. His example helped lead me to Jeff, and I am so thankful.

When my parents celebrated their 30th anniversary, my siblings and I surprised them with an anniversary party, complete with all of their friends and family. It is one of the few times we were really able to pull one off on my Dad. I will never forget his expression of shock as he walked in the door to my house and saw everyone gathered there to celebrate them. We thought we would be able to do a bigger more formal party for them when they made it to their 40th or 50th anniversary, but it turned out to be our only opportunity. I am so grateful that God gave us the inspiration to throw them that party. I am also grateful that we had a friend who is also a photographer take pictures of that night. They are treasures to me now.

I wish that my parents had been able to celebrate many more anniversaries together. But I am so lucky to have been a witness to the 35 1/2 years they were together.

I love you Mom and Dad. You are both my heroes.

Are you making a New Year's Resolution?

2010-12-20T08:56:00.002-06:00

Unbelievably, we only have 11 more days of 2010. I have some major issues with this, but that is a whole other post for later in the week.

In the meantime, I am thinking about New Year's Resolutions. One of mine is to spend more time with God, through his words in the Bible. I discovered when I read through the Bible this year that I am a better person when I spend time each day with God. I am going to be reading through the Bible, cover to cover, beginning on January 3rd.

I would love it if you would join me! You can read more about how to sign up here.

You can read about how I felt when I finished this program for the first time this fall here.

I am so excited about reading with the people who have already signed up! I am praying for each of you already. I encourage those of you who have signed up to start thinking about how you will fit in reading time everyday. What changes will you make in your schedule? I have found for me that it helps to break the reading up as I go through the day. I often read a couple pages here and there when the kids were occupied, or even when I was waiting for something to come out of the microwave. Other readers have told me that they did best when they blocked out a large chunk of time to accomplish all 12 pages for the day. (And 12 pages is it! That's all for each day! It makes it seem so much more like a manageable task when you think of it this way.)

I am hoping many of you will join me!! It will change your life, I promise.

Wrapping Frenzy!

2010-12-19T08:55:00.003-06:00

I am done with my Christmas shopping, but I haven't wrapped ONE.SINGLE.THING!

All the gifts are piled up in my secret hiding spot, just waiting. Have I ever told you that I don't have much patience for jobs that take a long time? I have lots of kid patience. Give me a room filled with kids, and I can wade through the worst of problems with buckets of patience. Give me a lot of vegetables to chop, cookies to bake, rooms to paint, or lots of presents to wrap, and I want to pull my hair out. I feel so overwhelmed with jobs that will take more than an hour, that I don't even want to start.

Which is why my secret hiding spot is making me anxious. The thought of all that wrapping is making my skin crawl.

I know what some of you are thinking...use a gift bag Christy.

But I just can't.

When I was little, the big magic of Christmas morning for me was presents to unwrap, all in a jumble under the tree. My Mom, God bless her, was much more practical with four kids. She used a lot of gift bags, and when we woke up on Christmas morning, each child had their own very organized pile of presents set somewhere in the room to make for easy opening.

As a Mom myself, I can understand where she was coming from, but I have this compulsion to give my kids that jumble under the tree, and the unwrapping experience. (Don't get me wrong...I know the presents aren't the most important part. But they are fun, right?!)

Tonight, after my little munchkins are tucked in their beds, I am going to make myself tackle that pile. I wish I could ask Jeff to help, but he has always wrapped his gifts in garbage bags. Unfortunately, I am not kidding. He's lucky I found him to be the nicest, smartest, most handsomest man otherwise that first Christmas we had when we were dating when he gave me a diamond necklace in a garbage bag might have been the end. Instead, I laughed and laughed. And I still laugh when he gives me his gift every year.

And so this is Christmas...

2010-12-18T15:18:00.003-06:00

I have been missing my little blog. I didn't mean to neglect it this month, but December? It's been crazy.

I know it's crazy for everybody, and I shouldn't complain. Not all of it has been bad crazy. There have been good moments, like Evan singing in a trio at the 6-8 Christmas concert at school.

Or when Charlie and Sammy sang their preschool Christmas program, and neither were scared to perform. Sammy now loves to walk around the house singing "Up On the Housetop", which is cuter than anything.

Or when my aunts, mom, and sister and I all got together and baked our brains out, and made hundreds of Christmas goodies, all in one day.

Or when I sang with the choir at Mass for my first performance sing my Dad died. Music lifts my spirit, and singing in church makes me feel surrounded by God's love. It's been so very healing.

Or when I got to spend my very favorite three weeks of the year with my class at school. There is nothing more magical than spending time with small children in December. I love my 1st graders. They've helped me to heal too.

Or when I got to go out to dinner with a good friend, and just talk. I love girl time.

There have also been ear aches, sinus infections, bronchitis, and crazy schedules, but I guess in looking back, I notice the good makes up for the crazy.

The good also helps to make up a little bit for the grief. I miss my Dad. SO much. Of course, it is harder around the holidays, but the every day things are so much harder to me. I wanted him to see Evan sing (and I prayed like crazy that he could peek down from heaven and see Evan, so brave up on that stage...and I really think he did). I want to call him on the phone and ask him a question. I want to see him at church. I want to drink coffee with him at breakfast on Sunday. I want to tell him I love him.

I'm getting by. I'm still excited about Christmas, mostly because my kids are excited. I still feel joy and happiness in my life and my family. But December would be so much better with Dad here with me. Maybe that's selfish, because I know how much joy he must be experiencing in heaven. The glory of Christmas in heaven must be incredible! I just wish we had gotten to have a little more time together here on Earth first.

Exciting Announcement!

2010-11-28T15:24:00.002-06:00

If you've been a regular reader around here, you might remember that this summer I completed the Bible in 90 Days online reading program along with Amy at Mom's Toolbox. It was the most incredible experience for me, and ended up being one of the things that helped me through my Dad's death the most. I can't recommend doing the Bible in 90 Days program enough!

In fact, a new session is set to begin on January 3rd, 2011. And this time, not only will I be reading the Bible in 90 Days again, I will be serving as a mentor for one of the groups reading through the Bible in 90 Days. I would be thrilled to have you join me!

To sign up, please visit here. When you complete the sign up form, you can indicate that you would like to be assigned to my reading group, if you would like for me to be your mentor. You are also able to join the program and be randomly assigned a mentor. The sign up goes live at midnight on Monday, November 29th.

I will be praying right away for every person who may be considering beginning this journey. It may seem like an overwhelming task at first, but the program does an outstanding job of dividing the daily reading assignments into very manageable chunks. If even have an inkling that God is calling you to read the entire Bible, I encourage you to pray about the Bible in 90 Days program. It is an amazing experience, and I guarantee you won't regret it!

Won't you join me?

Happy 4th Birthday Sammy!

2010-11-27T09:55:00.002-06:00

Happy birthday to my baby, my biggest surprise, my Sammy. Today starts the special two months of every year when Charlie and Sammy are the same age.

You will always be the perfect addition to our family. I love you forever Sammy K!

Welcome Home Aspen!

2010-11-24T21:28:00.003-06:00

This past weekend we were blessed with a new addition to our family. His name is Aspen, and he is an Alaskan Husky. He is one of the biggest dogs I've ever met, which should make me nervous, since big dogs have always intimidated me a bit. The only way to describe Aspen though is as a gentle giant. He is so calm, so friendly, and so laid back. He never barks, never has accidents in the house, and never jumps on people. He never goes for your crotch like so many dogs I know. He is a gentleman.

Most importantly, Aspen loves my kids. He has especially bonded with Evan. Aspen follows Evan all over the house, and sleeps in his room. The other night when Evan didn't feel well, he sat with his head on Evan's bed for over an hour, just looking into Evan's sleeping face. He took a break to eat dinner, and then went right back to Evan, and curled up on the floor next to the bed. You could just tell that he was worried about Evan.

He lets Charlie and Sammy love on him in their not always gentle preschool way. They both like to watch TV with their heads on his stomach, and Aspen just lays there patiently. He is one of the best dogs I've ever met.

We are blessed to have him.

Lovin' Norah Jones

2010-11-21T12:07:00.003-06:00

As my family and I have been working on returning to "normal" life and healing from the hurts of the last 4 months, we have turned to music over and over again to help us heal. Sometimes we choose praise and worship music when we need to feel Jesus by our side. Sometimes we choose fast and upbeat dance songs, so we can help our hearts to feel happy again. Sometimes we choose silly kids songs to help us think about other things. And sometimes we choose slow and mellow, for the times when we are exhausted from just putting one foot in front of the other.

This week we added a new album to the slow and mellow category. Norah Jones' new album called "Featuring".

I have always loved Norah Jones' smooth voice. It's so relaxing to listen to. Her new album features songs that she has collaborated on with other artists, including some of my favorites: Willie Nelson, Dolly Parton, (can you tell I love classic country?) and the Foo Fighters. All of the songs are smooth, mellow, and delicious. I love how all of the songs have a slightly different feel and flavor, depending on the collaborating artist.

This album has been my companion this week as I have worked up to facing a major holiday without my Dad. When I've needed to calm and center myself, Norah has been there to help. Music has always been a central part of my life, whether through band, various choirs, or just listening to my favorites on my iPod (or Walkman back in the day!) It's what I turn to to deal with emotions. I am thankful to have found another "go to" CD.

For more information on the album, you can go to:
The Norah Jones Site
Norah Jones on You Tube

Disclaimer: I was provided a free copy of Norah Jones' "Featuring" by the One 2 One Network.

My Comforter

2010-11-01T16:55:00.001-05:00

I was smacked in the face today by this verse...

“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as we share abundantly in Christ’s sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too. 2 Cor. 1:2

Thank you God for comforting me. For helping me through this trial. I am praying that He will use me to comfort others who may also feel the pain of loosing a loved one.

God IS amazing!

Happy Halloween!

2010-10-31T21:29:00.002-05:00

Hope you had as much fun as we did!

Life

2010-10-27T09:02:00.003-05:00

As much as I feel time should have stopped on September 28th, life and time does move on. I think it is doubly hard for me because for seven weeks after my Dad's surgery, life was on a crazy, hectic pace. I would go to work during the day, come home and rush dinner and homework, sneak in some family time with the kids, and then I would go to the hospital or to my parent's house to help care for my Dad. I didn't have much time to think, I only had time to do. To care for others.

After Dad died, not only was he gone, but the hectic pace came to an abrupt halt, and I was left with too much time to think. All of the emotion from Dad's passing, doubled with the emotional stress of the previous 7 weeks hit me like a freight train. I think this is why for a few weeks I would find myself doing an everyday mundane task and think to myself, "Why in the world do I have to do this? Why is this important?"

I am beginning to take joy in the everyday again. Mostly because I know how extremely irritated Daddy would be if we didn't enjoy our time here on Earth. I have enjoyed watching Charlie end his second soccer season with a trophy he is so proud of that he sleeps with it, seeing Sammy and Charlie dressed in Halloween costumes, and hearing Evan prepare for his Christmas concert where he will be singing in a trio. I am enjoying my classroom and my students, and the feeling it gives me of following a vocation from God. I feel purpose in being a wife, a mother, and a teacher. My role as a daughter is more important to me than ever. I want to be there for my Mom as much as possible as she journeys through this new stage in her life.

We are all learning to cope and to continue. We will always miss Dad, love Dad, and wish he was still here with us. But we will also still enjoy, love, and embrace the life we still have to lead.

Photographs

2010-10-15T15:19:00.007-05:00

It was not the first time I had tried to wish and pray myself into a picture.

When I was 12, Nickelodeon started playing reruns of the Monkees TV show. I fell head first into my first celebrity crush...Micky Dolenz, the handsome and curly haired drummer of the 1960s band was the first guy to make my heart pound. Never mind that he was in his 40s by the time I was introduced to him. My Mom helped to feed my obsession when she dug through her old record collection, and found me an original Monkees album, which I then listened to ad nauseum on my record player.

Not long afterwards, I read a book in which the main character stared so hard at a picture she found herself tumbling into it, and she had a whole new life inside the photograph. My 12 year old self thought about how awesome this would be, and I am embarrassed to admit, tried mightily to wish myself into a picture of Micky Dolenz on the beach. I found the picture on the back of the album cover, and boy oh boy, did I want to join his 20 year old handsome self next to the sand and the surf.

A couple of days ago, I was looking through pictures of our trip to the lake last summer. I was missing my dad terribly, and I needed to see his face. I came across a picture of my Dad and I playing shuffleboard on the court behind our cabins. We had the best time together. He beat the pants off me the first three games we played. The next night though, I started to get the hang of it. He was proud of me for giving him a challenge, but I never did beat him. When I looked into the picture, I saw him as he was just three short months ago. So strong. So healthy. I was overwhelmed with a sense of disbelief. How can it be that he isn't here anymore? How can it be possible that I can't call him on the phone and remind what a great time we had playing shuffle board? He was so healthy. And so vibrant. Neither of the people in the picture had any clue our time left together was so short, and we wouldn't have believed it if you had told us.

And then I stared and stared at my Dad. And I wanted so badly to go inside that photograph and be able to have that one night with him again. To give him a hug and tell him I love him one more time. Or to be able to warn him of the future, and beg him not to get that stupid surgery. I know it doesn't do any good to keep thinking it, or saying it, but ohmygosh....I want my Daddy back.

And then I remembered being 12 and doing the same thing, and I had to giggle a little. It also made me remember that my Dad took me to a Monkees concert the year I was 12, at Rosenblatt stadium. It was my first and only concert I have ever been to, and I loved it. He even brought me a Monkees souvenir book and I still have it. I am sure Dad was miserable, but I am so thankful that he was the kind of Dad who was willing to be miserable just to make his daughter happy.

They aren't enough to make up for him being gone, or to fill the empty void, but I am so glad that I have so many wonderful memories of my Dad. I am so glad that I told him I loved him so many times after his surgery. I would welcome the chance to tell him a thousand more times, but I know that he knows.

The one thing I am sure of, and the one thing that does make me feel better, is that I still feel his love for me. All the way from heaven.

Loops

2010-10-09T08:58:00.002-05:00

My brain is thinking in loops lately. I find myself having the same thoughts over and over again through the day. What is amazing, is that I can have these thoughts at the same time I am teaching, doing the laundry, or getting the kids in the tub. I can't seem to be fully present in the moment.

My main train of thought is "How can this be?" "How can it be possible my Dad won't come over for dinner ever again? How can it be that someone so healthy isn't with us anymore? How can it be that we just had a funeral for my Dad?" Maybe in thinking this over and over again I am subconsciously trying to accept a reality that just doesn't make any sense at all.

I have also discovered that grief is exhausting. I have never felt so deep down, bone tired before this.

I am just trying to keep putting one foot in front of the other. And the thing that helps me to do that is that I know my Dad is saying prayers for me to have strength to get through the day. I know he is still taking care of me, just in a different way than he did here on Earth.

I Can See the Thestrals

2010-10-07T20:13:00.003-05:00

If you are a Harry Potter fan, you may remember the thestrals which pull the carriages full of students from the Hogwarts express to the school. Most of the students think the carriages are magic, and move on their own, but students who have seen death can see the invisible thestral creatures pulling the carriages.

That's how I have been feeling this week, as I have had to return to work. Everyone has been so friendly and helpful, but it seems that people are divided into two groups. The first is made up of people who care about you, but have never been through the death of someone very close to them. They don't know what to say or what to do, so they don't look at you. They don't mean to, but they make you feel like you may have the plague. They don't want your fate to be theirs, and they don't want to see your pain.

The second group is made up of people who know just exactly how wretched it is. They have been through it themselves and know that you are feeling like you have a black hole in your chest instead of a heart. They reach out with hugs, and words, and love, and action. They look you in the eyes when they say, "It absolutely sucks, doesn't it?" And when you look back, you see your own pain mirrored in their eyes. And you know they can see the thestrals too.

I Love You Daddy

2010-10-06T20:33:00.003-05:00

On Tuesday September 28, at 10:45 in the morning, my Daddy went to be with Jesus in heaven. His heart, so tired after all of it's struggles after his surgery, simply wore out and stopped beating. Maybe someday, I will be able to write about that day here. For now, it is too raw, too personal, and too agonizing. When I try to sleep, my brain replays the 8 hours of terror from the time my Mom called me at 2:15 in the morning to tell me his Life Vest had alarmed and the paramedics were at their house, to the time my Mom and my siblings and I stood around his hospital bed, holding on to him and saying good bye.

My Daddy was so much more than just a Dad to me. He was also my hero, my friend, and my protector. He was my mentor and model. Most everything I have done in my life has been with the intent to make my Dad proud of me. At his wake service last Thursday, I knew I had to write and read a eulogy to him. I wanted him to be proud of me again, and I wanted the world to know what an amazing man he was. Is. I know that just because he is in heaven, he hasn't stopped being amazing. I know that he is continuing to love and care for me, and always will.

I am so proud, and so thankful, that I was able to read the following words that night clearly, and without faltering. It was my gift to my Dad. It was my way to send my love to him. Here is what I read:

Creighton John Micek Jr. Also known as John, CJ, Creighton, and Poppo. But to me, he is Daddy. All of you know him from different places. To some of you he is brother, friend, coworker, bike riding buddy, or fellow member of the Buttheads. All of us here though can say that regardless of where we knew him from, he was one of the best men we’ve ever known. Tonight I would like to share with you some stories about my Dad that exemplify the qualities that made him so special to so many.

Dad grew up in a family of 10 children. He was closest in age to his sister Linda. He spoke of riding bikes with her to the library, and then taking their books into the cool of the basement to read away an afternoon together. Linda also often talks fondly of walking home from school for lunch together, hand in hand. The two of them developed a lifelong love of books, but it was Dad who continued with bike riding into adulthood. He rode in countless years of Bicycle Ride Across Nebraska events, and organized many weekend riding excursions with friends. This was how his group of friends, the Buttheads, got their start. Dad firmly believed that everyone should enjoy riding a bike, and when he made a new friend, that friend would often quickly find himself gripping handlebars and peddling quickly.

It was also Dad who brought people together. He loved to meet new people and bring them into his circle of friends. For example, the people he loved to play pool with were work friends, brothers, and biking and hiking buddies. Dad had a knack for mixing people of all backgrounds together, and creating a social group that loved to have fun.

In addition to his friends, family was a large part of his heart.

My parents met on March 10, 1972. He remained devoted to my Mom ever after. Through his love for Mom, Dad provided a wonderful example to us of marriage. Though they had their ups and downs like all couples, Dad never wavered in his faithfulness and devotion in their almost 36 years of marriage.

Dad was also the most dedicated of fathers. Here my brothers and sister and I have many stories to share. When it was only Sarah and I, and Mom worked weekends, Dad was in charge. He could only cook one meal, so every Saturday night he made us macaroni and cheese, hot dogs, and pork ‘n beans. To make up for the meal, afterwards he would always fix us a Tostinos party pizza and let us stay up and watch Creature Feature while we snuggled on his lap.

When Creighton came along, he was the cutest, chubbiest, but also the most colicky baby any of us had ever laid eyes on. Every night like clockwork, just as Dad was coming home from work, Creighton would start screaming. Dad was the only one who could calm him down by doing what we called his Indian War Dance. He would walk around the house for hours, bouncing Creighton on his hip, and singing an Indian war cry.

Ben’s arrival brought with it a series of health issues that required many procedures done at Medical City Dallas. Dad quickly ran out of vacation time, so every weekend he would drive 13 hours down to Dallas after work on Friday, and have to return on Sunday, just to spend a few hours with Mom and Ben. He always gave exactly what a situation required, without complaint.

Just as this was a great example for us, he taught his children other things by example as well. For 15 years after my Grandpa’s stroke, Dad gave Papa Creighton a weekly shower, did their bills, handled home repair, and Ben even remembers winding their grandfather clock every week before we left. When Dad became sick in August, we all knew just what to do because he had shown us. We had a family meeting and voluntarily took on chores and responsibilities that he could no longer do. Not only did he serve others, but he always did it with a joyful heart. Just by watching how he treated people, we learned honesty, integrity, and loyalty. Even when he was feeling his very worst these last two months, he made sure to call each health care worker by name, and thank them for their care.

He didn’t reserve his kindness just for friends and family, but for everyone that he met. At Mutual, he met a woman named Lou who worked in the coffee shop. He always struck up a conversation, and they quickly became friends. When she heard he was sick, she found my brother Creighton online and told him to tell Dad that his first cup of coffee when he came back would be on her, and he promised to collect.

While Dad was an honorable man, he was certainly not stuffy, and he loved to have fun. He loved to take his grandson Evan camping with the guys. Dad, the frustrated astronomer, loved to shoot off rockets as a kid, so he enjoyed introducing Evan to the joys of rocket building. He also loved to think of activities specific to the interests of each grandchild. Dad played in the black truck with Colin, played air hockey with Charlie and Sammy, and read princess books to Brooke. One of Dad’s favorite pastimes was lounging in the horse tank, and all of us loved to soak in the sun with him and enjoy a beer or a root beer.

Daddy and I were always very close. I knew that I didn’t want to go through childbirth without him there to hold my hand and coach me through. I will always treasure the memory of him being present at the births of all three of my children. I will never forget his excited expression as he welcomed Evan into the world, and introduced himself into Poppo dom. Dad and I always thought exactly alike. We could just look at each other, and know we were having the exact same thought.

He was the BEST dad ever and loved each of his children fiercely. When he discovered that the name Sarah meant little princess, he thought it was perfect, and forever after he referred to her as his little princess. He beamed with pride when Creighton came along, and he could proudly pass on his name and introduce the world to Creighton John Micek III. Benjamin was Joseph’s younger brother in the Bible, and the Bible describes him as much loved. Dad thought this was the perfect name for Ben, as he always was very protective of him.

So tonight, we’ve looked at the qualities that made Dad so special. Each and every person in this room has been blessed for knowing him. He is a gift to us that we will always carry in our hearts, we hope that you will too.

I love you Daddy. I miss you every second of every day. My heart has a big empty hole, right in the middle that won't be fixed until I can see you again.

A New Normal

2010-09-15T17:05:00.002-05:00

Now that Dad is home again, we are continuing to put one foot in front of the other, and take his recovery day by day. It is agonizingly slow, but we are praying that clot is shrinking daily. I am so proud of my Dad for working so hard, for trying to so hard to be positive, and for keeping up the fight. I think this is one of the hardest things he's ever done.

There are a thousand times a week I still think, "I should call Dad and we can..." or "I bet Dad would like to..." and then it all settles over me again. It's hard to get used to his limitations, but I am thankful they aren't permanent . I am trying to think of ways to bring his favorite things to him until he can do them himself again.

One thing I don't want to return to normal, is this new awareness I have of every moment with him, with my family, with friends. I am hyper aware of how easily someone can leave you, and how quickly life can change. I have been so much more thankful for small moments and every day things. I don't want to loose that-instead I want to soak up EVERYTHING.

On Monday, it was my Dad's 58th birthday. I stopped by my parent's house just for a few minutes so the boys and I could give him birthday hugs. It was so nice to see him smile, watch him watch my kids, and tell him I love him. I am never going to see my Dad and not tell him I love him ever again. You never know when it might be your last chance, and I want him to know he is LOVED.

Home and Birthdays

2010-09-11T22:22:00.003-05:00

My Dad is back home from the hospital. Again.

And I am so, so, so glad. I know probably every kid thinks their parents are the best, but I truly know that my Dad is one of the BEST Dads ever. He was such an awesome example growing up of how to be an honorable, trustworthy, loving person. He taught me integrity and how to serve others with a joyful heart. In the hospital, he continued these lessons by treating every nurse, tech, doctor, and therapist with respect and cheerfulness, calling each one by name, even when he felt at his lowest. I love him for all of these things, and for his spunky personality. I am so happy he is my Daddy, and that he is home again. I want to have many more years to laugh and learn with him. I am SO lucky to be his daughter. SO lucky.

It is my Dad's birthday on Monday. The best of birthdays is a birthday that you almost didn't get to have, and we are rejoicing that we get to celebrate this day with him.

It is my handsome Jeff's birthday tomorrow. We are going to welcome him into middle age with white cake with white frosting (his favorite), some very inspired presents, and his favorite foods for dinner. I haven't mentioned on this blog lately how adorable he is, and how great of a Dad he is, and how much I love him, but he is and I do.

I am beyond blessed to have these two men in my life. How did I get so lucky as to have two of the best men on the planet in my life? I can't wait to spend their special days with each of them.

Depressing

2010-09-08T18:03:00.003-05:00

The doctors found a large clot in the left ventricle of my Dad's heart today, which made it impossible for them to complete any of the other procedures they had planned for today. He will now need to take blood thinners for 2-3 weeks to try and dissolve the clot, and then they will try again.

He is so depressed about this development. I wish there was more I could do to lift his spirits. I wish that I could take away his frustration, and go through this for him. It is the worst thing in the world to have to watch a loved one struggle.

I just want my Daddy back. I want him to be healthy and happy. I am willing to do anything to get that back.

Back in the Hospital

2010-09-07T16:51:00.003-05:00

My Dad had to go back in to the hospital last night.

After many tests today, the doctors have discovered that as a result of the damage done by the heart attack, he has developed an arrhythmia that people typically display during a heart attack. It can be fatal, as it can cause cardiac arrest with a heart attack. They are going to do a procedure tomorrow morning to try and convert him to a normal heart rhythm. They will also remove a small section of the heart that can sometimes send irregular electrical impulses to the heart.

The doctors think the original open heart surgery he went in for in the first place was not successful, and that now he needs an internal pace maker. Unfortunately, they can't do that for another 2 months so that his heart can heal. Even if they convert him tomorrow, he could at any time go back into this arrhythmia again, so he will have to wear something called a Life Vest for the next two months. The vest senses when the heart goes into the arrhythmia and it shocks the heart to get it back into normal rhythm.

It looks like he will be back in the hospital again for awhile. I am really nervous about the procedure tomorrow. His heart is already so weak, and it makes me anxious to have them messing around in there again.

Prayers for my Dad are greatly appreciated right now. I know that all things are possible through our Lord Jesus, and I am putting Dad in His hands.

I FINISHED!

2010-09-06T21:19:00.004-05:00

I did it!

I read the Bible, cover to cover, in 80 days. I pushed through to the end today, and read the last 6 day sections in one day. The writings of Paul, Timothy, and the other disciples at the end of the New Testament were riveting for me. It was easy to keep going until the end.

This may sound cliche, but it really was life changing for me. In June, when I started, I felt God calling me strongly to do this. Looking back on the events of the past month, I really feel he wanted me to be immersed in the scriptures as my family and I went through this challenge with my Dad. It was so comforting to feel God next to me every day, and to hear him talking to me through my daily time in the Word.

I learned SO MUCH. Before I read the Bible, I knew bits and pieces of scripture, and didn't know much of the "big picture". So much makes sense to me now, and I have a clearer idea of what I need to do to be a follower of Jesus. I learned so much about my roles as wife, mother, and teacher. I feel closer to Jesus. And also? I feel JOY.

Thanks so much to Amy at Moms Toolbox, for leading this challenge. I am so thankful for your leadership and guidance, and for providing us with this opportunity.

I would love for all of you to join me this winter at Moms Toolbox in reading the Bible in 90 Days. That's right! I'm going to do it again! I know there is so much more God wants to say to me, and I am going to be able to study more deeply on my second time through. I am also going to serve as a mentor to other readers. I am passionate about sharing this experience with others! Pray about it...I would be so excited to read with you!

Life Update

2010-09-06T08:53:00.002-05:00

Oh my poor little blog! How I've missed you! Life has been like a freight train lately though, and it has been a struggle just to keep my family fed and clothed. Thank goodness for Labor Day weekend, because I finally had the chance to deep clean my house. I won't describe how badly it needed it, because you would probably throw up.

Another reason that I had some extra time this weekend is because MY DAD CAME HOME FROM THE HOSPITAL ON FRIDAY!!!! After a LONG 24 day stay in the hospital, he is home. Friday was my day for hospital duty, so I had the absolute honor and privilege of getting to drive him home and help him walk into the house. I cannot put into words how emotional that experience was for both of us. After going through a time when we thought we would never get to see him alive again, tell him we love him, joke around with him, or enjoy family gatherings with him at my parents home, helping him walk through the door was amazing. My heart wanted to burst with thankfulness. My Dad looked around and could just say, "This is wonderful. Just wonderful."

He still has a long way to go in his recovery. He is using a walker to get around, and just a trip to the bathroom wears him out, but we are seeing gradual improvements to his strength every day. He is having trouble retaining fluid as his heart heals, but the doctors tell us this will slowly get better. He has nurses checking in on him at home regularly, and we take his vital signs twice a day and send them in via computer to the nurses station. It's nice to know we have a medical team behind us while he is at home.

Remember over the summer when we were agonizing over whether their new house was the right choice? After all of this, we all recognize that it was God's choice, and He provided it because it is absolutely perfect for my Dad. The layout and size is perfect for his mobility issues. There is no way he could have gone home to their other house filled with stairs. The fact that the house is two seconds away from mine have allowed me to easily take care of things around the house for them, and to help out if Mom and Dad need anything. There have been so many things, large and small, that took place before all of this happened that have made all of this easier on our family. It has been so awe inspiring to see all of the ways that the Lord is taking care of things. It has been the ultimate lesson in trusting His plan, not ours. He truly does know what is best, and will handle things how they should be.

This weekend, I am thankful. For so very many things. Even through trying times, the Lord blesses us, and I am just so thankful for His love and care. We're going to make it through this, and I think we will all be better for it.

Bible in 90 Days: Check in 10

2010-09-06T08:34:00.002-05:00

I am almost to the finish line! There have been several times during the last few weeks when my Dad has been in the hospital that I have been behind, but God has always provided a time to catch up. Sometimes it has been hard to use that extra time for reading instead of sleeping or just vegging on the couch, but the blessings I have received from reading have helped to keep me focused.

Today, I just finished Day 83, in 2 Corinthians and Galatians. On Thursday evening, I really felt God calling me to push ahead in my reading this weekend. I have been reading 2-3 days worth every day since. My goal is to read Days 84 and 85 today as well.

I love Paul's writings. I am learning SO.MUCH. I have been using my highlighter to mark down things that jump out at me while I read so I can go back and study them further later, and I have definitely used a lot of ink in these sections!

I am going to finish this week! I will write out more of my thoughts on what an amazing journey this has been when I do. This is the best thing I have ever done for my relationship with God. I sincerely encourage each of you to read the entire Bible, cover to cover, as well. God will work amazing things in your life when you do! To check out the Bible in 90 Days program, visit Amy at Mom's Toolbox.com

Bible in 90 Days: Check in 7 and LOTS of other stuff

2010-08-15T09:04:00.005-05:00

This has been one of the worst weeks of my life. Truly.

My Dad had an open heart procedure done on Tuesday morning. It was done to help correct problems he has had with atrial fib (when your heart gets out of rhythm) since he was 27. The procedure went fine, and the surgeon was just counting instruments before they closed all the incisions when my Dad had a massive heart attack on the operating table. It took the doctor a minute to figure out what was going on, but while he was trying to work through possibilities, he shocked my Dad's heart to try and restart it. Nothing. He tried massaging the heart with his hands. Nothing. So they put him on a heart lung machine, and did an emergency double bypass surgery. Unfortunately, since he didn't have time to discover where the blockage was located, he had to guess while performing the bypass. That night, we were SO THANKFUL that he was still alive. A nurse called my sister from the hospital right after the heart attack to tell her to get to the hospital right away because our dad wasn't going to make it. The doctor didn't think he would make it through the surgery. I felt so bad for my sister that she had to pass that message on to the rest of our siblings. My Mom was in such shock in the waiting room, she couldn't make the call herself.

The bypass only treated one of the two blockages my Dad had, so that first night he struggled mightily to keep his blood pressure up, and his heart still had to work so hard. They couldn't sedate him or give him much pain meds that night because it would make his blood pressure fall further, so he was aware. He had a vent in, so couldn't communicate with his voice, but at about 2:00 in the morning, my Mom figure out he was writing letters on his bed sheet trying to communicate with us. He spelled out HOT, THIRSTY, and also I WAS AWAKE. "What do you mean you were awake?" my Mom asked. "During surgery?" He spelled out SHOCK. We figured out he was aware of it when the tried to defibrillate his heart with the shock paddles. My Mom asked him if it hurt. He shook his head no. When we have told medical professionals about this, they are amazed. It would/should not have been possible for him to be aware of anything then between sedation and having no blood pressure and low oxygen. We are pretty sure he had a near death experience, especially since he did not feel pain when they shocked him.

The surgeon discovered the next day that another blockage was still making his heart work too hard, so they did an immediate angioplasty and put in a stint. Thankfully that took care of the blockage. His heart was so shocked after everything though, his blood pressure was still low, so they put him on a machine new to the US called an Impella machine to help his heart beat. He was the first patient in the hospital to ever use it! He also had a balloon pump located under the heart to help it pump.

As of today, he still has the vent, and the balloon pump, and he has been sedated since Wednesday morning. He has a temp this morning, so they are checking to see where/what kind of infection may be forming. His kidneys aren't quite up to par either, so they are keeping a close eye on that as well. We have been praying incessantly for the past 5 days. I have truly felt God's presence in every moment.

Needless to say my Bible reading got off track for a few days during all of this, but with the exception of today's reading, I am all caught up. I am reading Jeremiah, which has not been terribly comforting. To be honest, I really struggle with the Old Testament. It is hard to see the loving God I feel everyday with the God who was constantly wiping out the Israelites. I wish I was reading the New Testament through all of this trial in our lives. I am going to keep on track as much as I can this week.

Please pray for my Dad.

You can read more about the Bible in 90 Days program by visiting Mom's Toolbox.

Bible in 90 Days: Check in 6

2010-08-08T15:22:00.002-05:00

Thank you to all who said a prayer for me last week that a new TA be hired for my classroom! God was listening, and has blessed my room with a TA who has been a teacher for 40 years, 23 of them in 1st grade! I can't wait to get to know her.

I am still on track with my reading. I am reading Day 52 today. Over the summer, I read the Bible in the mornings. Since I am back to work today, I will be switching to a evening, after the kids are in bed reading time. I am going to miss starting my day off with God time, but I just can't pry my eyes open any earlier than 5:30, which is my school day wake up time. This is going to be the critical week for me! I feel that if I can make it through this first week back at work and stay current on my reading, I will be able to finish the program on track! Only 36 more days to go, and I know I can do this for a month.

The New Testament is coming up in less than 200 pages, and I can't wait! Please visit Amy at Mom's Toolbox if you would like to learn more about the Bible in 90 Days program.

Bible in 90 Days: Check in 5

2010-08-02T06:00:00.001-05:00

I am still up to date in my reading this week. I just finished Day 45 today, which means that I am now half way through the Bible. I am so proud to have made it this far!

With the news last week about not having a TA to start the school year with, I am really nervous about my reading once school starts. My work load has doubled, and most of that will be taking place at home. We shall see how everything works out! Please pray that God sends a wonderful TA to my classroom this year.

Today I finished Psalms. I loved reading this book, and it was amazing to me to discover how many songs we sing at church that take their lyrics directly from the Bible. There is so much wisdom packed into the pages of Psalms it was a little easy to get bogged down in the reading. I had to try not to ponder every line too hard, or my reading took forever!

I am really looking forward to reading Proverbs next! As always, you can check out Amy's blog at Mom's Toolbox for more information on the Bible in 90 Days program.

Pine Beach

2010-08-01T16:24:00.008-05:00

In July we drove up to northern Minnesota to Lake Belle Taine. This is our family's favorite vacation spot. We stay at a family lake resort called Pine Beach. I am so lucky that my kids feel the way that I do about sun, sand, and water. These are the only things we need on vacation to have a wonderful time!

We stayed in this cute yellow cabin...

My parents, brother, and aunt rented the cabin next door to us. The boys all loved running back and forth from Grandma and Poppo's cabin, and having the freedom to get a treat and a hug from them whenever they wanted. You can see in the picture that the beach and the lake are literally right outside the cabin, just off the deck. This makes the deck an amazing place to drink your morning coffee, read the Bible, and appreciate the beauty God created for us...

I loved it in the morning when the water was as still as glass, there were beautiful colors reflected from the sunrise, and a cool mist was hanging over the lake. It was breath taking.

We spent every second possible in the water swimming. The swim lessons Charlie and Sammy took every day for a month before we left were so worthwhile. They were like fishes.

When we weren't swimming, we were lounging in the warm sunshine on the beach. The weather in Minnesota in the summer is perfect. It never got above 83, and there was no humidity. Ever. This is so different from Omaha!

The resort also offers lots of other activities. Sammy and Charlie loved the playhouse, feeding the goats that wander the resort, and the swingset. My Dad and I loved having some fierce shuffle board competitions in the evenings after dinner.

Evan loved the fishing. He is the only one in our family who enjoys this, so often he fished off the dock. My Dad took him in the boat a couple of times, and ended up having to get the fish Evan caught off the hook, which is another notch for him in his quest for most awesome Grandpa award. My Dad is a great lover of fish, and it pains him to trap and kill them.

I am in love with this picture of Evan. I had it enlarged to a 16x20, and I am going to hang it somewhere in the house. So peaceful and innocent.

My Dad took the boat out almost everyday. I love this picture of him...

My Dad? He is the best. I love him to pieces.

And with beauty like this...

Is it any wonder that we are already planning our trip for next year? I am already counting the days until I am back, relaxing on this beach.

Sadness

2010-07-27T08:41:00.003-05:00

I am filled with sadness and worry this morning.

For the past seven years, I have been ever so blessed to teach with one of my dearest friends, Linda my Teacher's Assistant. She filled my day with camaraderie and humor, patience and love. She made coming to work each day something to look forward to.

Linda called me this morning to tell me that she will not be returning to school this year. Her mother is very ill, and Linda will now be caring for her Mom and her mentally challenged brother. I feel so awful for Linda, who has a tough road ahead. I am praying hard for Linda and her family. I wish there was something I could do to make this time easier for her.

Change and I? We're not good friends. Knowing change is on the horizon sends me into a worried tizzy. I hate this about myself. I wish I were better about meeting new challenges and changes like an adventure, excited for what lies ahead. I am filled with knots when I think about teaching this year without my friend at my side.

I am going to do my best and turn this worry over to God. I know that His plans are always better than mine, and I need to remind myself of this. What the Lord has planned for both Linda and I on our now divergent paths is better than anything I could ever dream up. I am going to shoot for a positive outlook on this.

Still, I am going to miss Linda so very, very much. My heart aches for her.

Bible in 90 Days: Check in 4

2010-07-25T19:37:00.003-05:00

I am still on track in my Bible reading! I still haven't missed a day, and I am happy that I will pass the half way point before returning to work. I am saving my two grace days for when I am back to teaching, as I am nervous how my work schedule will affect my reading. So far, so good though.

Today I will be completing Day 38. I am in the middle of the Book of Job. Job has been an interesting read. It's a bit depressing, and this may not be politically correct to say, but I see poor Job as a bit of a whiner. I know he was in a terrible situation, and a lot of pain, and maybe that made it hard for him to see what God had in mind for him. It is reminding me of a friend I know, who recently gave birth to a stillborn baby. Though she is enduring great emotional pain, and is probably every bit as miserable as Job was, she is holding tight to her faith. She sees God in so many moments throughout her day. Instead of moaning and groaning about what has happened to her, she is praising God. I can't stop thinking about her and her faith as I read one of Job's speeches. I am hoping at the end, Job will find the same grace and clarity my friend has.

I am loving Amy's reflections on our daily readings. She is so good at getting meaning out of the verses, and relating it to her own daily life. I am not doing very well at this. Because it is all new to me in many sections, I am only able to read for the overall story. I am hoping to do a second read of the entire Bible when I am done. Hopefully the second time around I will be able to dig a little deeper.

You can read more about the Bible in 90 Days program here!

5 Years

2010-07-22T09:05:00.005-05:00

5 years ago today, I married the love of my life.

Five years! I just can't believe it has been that long. I am still in awe that we found each other, and that God has blessed us with this time together. Marriage is not easy, but Jeff makes it all worth it.

And even though these five years have sped by, it has been long enough to create this...

Taken outside our cabin on our recent lake trip

The family I always wanted. From the time I was very young, I knew that God wanted me to be a wife, a mom, and a teacher. I felt these callings deep down in my heart, and I spent a lot of time dreaming about them. And now that I have these people to love and call my own? Awesome. I am so, SO blessed!

Happy Anniversary Jeff! I love you more than you will ever know. Thank you for walking through life with me!

Bible in 90 Days: Check in 3

2010-07-19T08:33:00.003-05:00

We're back from vacation! It was an awesome, relaxing week filled with sun, sand, family bonding, swims, and....Bible reading! I was a little nervous that I wouldn't be able to keep up with the reading schedule while we were away, but it turned out to be my most prayerful reading time yet. It was so nice to take my Bible out to the deck, drink my morning coffee, look at the beauty of the lake, and spend time with God.

As a result, I am still current on my reading, and today will read day 31. I am going to finish 1 Chronicles today. This book has by far been the most challenging for me to stick with. The list of names that goes on and on is confusing, and to tell the truth, not as exciting as the previous parts of the Old Testament I have read. The overwhelming thing I have noticed is the early Israelite's intense need to record genealogy. I wish I knew why this why important to them in a cultural context.

Nonetheless, long lists of names or not, I am going to keep reading! I was excited yesterday to note that I am a third of the way through my goal! It's been a great experience so far, and I can't wait to see what lies ahead.

Don't forget to check in here if you would like to learn more about this program-I highly recommend it!

Vacation pictures are coming soon!

And...We're Off!!

2010-07-09T19:36:00.003-05:00

I have spent the last two days washing load after load of laundry, packing, sorting, and collecting items from all over the house. When I was finished, I looked at the mountainous pile sitting next to the front door and sighed. It was going to be no easy task to fit all this crap into the car.

It was like playing a giant game of Tetris, but our van is now loaded. To the brim, but loaded. Evan will just barely be able to stuff himself into the backseat, but I don't think we'll have to resort to tying any of the children to the luggage rack.

The new GPS system is installed and waiting to direct us to the Pine Beach resort in Nevis, Minnesota. And the kids? They are beyond excited. We are anxiously awaiting seven days of lakeside living. We have many sand castles, afternoon swims, nighttime games of Kings in the Corner, and boat rides planned. I can't wait to unplug with my family at one of my favorite places on Earth.

See you next week! We are off to relax, and enjoy each other!

Lovely Birthday

2010-07-07T14:42:00.002-05:00

I am having the nicest of birthdays! I have been overwhelmed with the number of "Happy Birthday" messages and phone calls I have received today. I am feeling loved, and what is better than that?

I was folding laundry when the UPS man rang my doorbell. Is there anything more exciting than when that lovely package man rings your doorbell on your birthday and you know you didn't order anything? I got a tingly feeling, as I just knew it was a present! And what a deliciously wonderful present it was! My TA at school, Linda, sent me the most beautiful framed picture. It has our last name in large beautiful letters, and behind it are the names of all of our family members. It is so gorgeous, and it is already hanging above our fire place. One of the very best parts of coming to work at my school was getting to meet this woman who has become one of my very best friends. I am SO SO lucky to spend all day at work with one of my favorite people!

Evan is feeling under the weather today with a stomach ache, which isn't good, but it does mean I don't have to sweat it out at a swim meet tonight, and instead I can enjoy a yummy birthday dinner and some cake. I am thinking of frying up some chicken, y'all. Everyone knows you can't gain weight on your birthday, right?

Not having to go to swim practice this morning also means I am getting a head start on the laundry and the packing that I need to accomplish before I load my four handsome guys into the car on Saturday morning for our road trip to Minnesota. All in all, it's been the best of days.

Birthday

2010-07-06T22:00:00.004-05:00

It's my birthday tomorrow. I can't figure out why, but I am feeling so anxious right now. I think some of it has to do with the fact that I am going to be 33 tomorrow. Can you believe that?! Thirty three!!! 33 is firmly entrenched in middle age. UGH. You might even say I am in my mid 30s. Double ugh. I still feel 18.

While we were packing up my parents house a couple of weeks ago, we were looking at picture albums of my siblings and I when we were little. My dad pointed out that I am now older than he was in many of the early pictures. Yeesh!! How in the world does that happen? Only yesterday I was graduating from high school. Except it turns out that yesterday is really 15 years ago.

I think the other thing bothering me is that I am wanting the calendar to sloooooow down. I am so enjoying my kids this summer. I have no desire to go back to school. I love being with my family all day. I sure wish I could find a million dollars between now and August.

At any rate, I am going to try and focus on the positive tomorrow. I am going to enjoy a morning run. I am going to marvel at my two youngest children who have gone from non swimmers to swimming 50 meter laps in only three and a half weeks of daily swim lessons. I am going to take a nap and snuggle with my Sammy. I am going to watch Evan speed through the water in his last swim meet of the summer. And I am going to buy myself a birthday cake and have my boys help me blow out the candles.

Although I can't believe I am 33, I am so thankful for every second I have had to celebrate life. I am so thankful for my many blessings.

Reading the Bible in 90 Days: First Check In

2010-07-05T08:00:00.002-05:00

Today, Amy at Mom's Toolbox, the online leader of my Bible in 90 Days reading group, has asked each of us to do a quick introduction of ourselves, and update in the progress of our reading. So, for those of you who are regular readers, or who know me in real life, I hope you don't mind a "reintroduction" to Christy.

I am 32, (soon to be 33 in two days) and the mother of three active, energetic boys. My oldest Evan, is 11. Charlie and Sammy are Irish twins who were born 10 months and 10 days apart. Charlie is 4, and Sammy is 3. Needless to say, they all keep me on my toes. I have been married to my best friend Jeff for 5 years this month. I consider it the greatest honor and joy of my life to be wife and mother to these 4 incredible boys.

I decided to read the Bible in 90 Days because I feel very unfamiliar with large sections of scripture. I have been raised in the Catholic church, and while we hear three different scripture passages at every church service, I don't feel like there was very much emphasis placed on reading, memorizing, or understanding the Bible. I know the highlights of the old testament, like Noah and Moses, but that's it. I am so excited to know scripture in detail, and in a more personal manner. I am excited to read quickly so that I can get a historical perspective.

Although today is the official start date, I am already on Day 17 of my reading. I ordered the Bible in 90 days Bible to use, as it's in large print and contains less foot notes to distract from reading. (It is not an abridged version). When it arrived in the mail, I was so excited, I just couldn't wait to start! I am currently through Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, and Deuteronomy. I already know so much more than when I started, I am absolutely amazed. I am also coming up with lots of questions, and I am excited to share these with the online reading group.

This has been an amazing experience already, and I can't wait to see what comes next! Thanks for listening to my journey! You can click here to read Amy's post today.

Another New Project...

2010-06-15T08:22:00.002-05:00

On Sunday night on Twitter, I learned about a great program called Couch to 5K. It is an amazing program that uses interval training to take you from being a couch potato to being able to run a 5K in just 9 weeks.

I just started back up at the gym last week, trying to run myself into a more healthy weight. I did okay, but I think I started into things too quickly. After running my knees and ankles hurt, and the next morning after a workout was filled with stiffness and pain. This program couldn't have come at a better time for me!

It utilizes periods of running/walking to help you work up to running a full 3 miles without stopping. I started with Week 2, since I had been running last week. Week 2 features 90 seconds of running alternating with periods of walking. It was the perfect pace for me. I never thought I couldn't do it, and afterwards....there was no pain! That is huge for me, as the aftereffects are often what stop me from running. I downloaded the Podrunners podcast featured on the site, which was really helpful. It provides upbeat music and tones that help you know when to walk, when to run, and when to cool down.

If you would like to join and you are also a Twitter user, there is a group of us who are using the program together to offer support. Just tweet after your workout, and use the hashtag #runningtaters

I am off to the gym right now...can't wait for day 2!

Blogging Through the Bible in 90 Days

2010-06-14T15:13:00.003-05:00

I am excited to be starting a new challenge this summer! Along with Amy at Mom's Toolbox, I will be reading the entire Bible in 90 days, beginning on July 5th.

I am nervous to begin. The Bible has always completely intimidated me. I find the language hard to decipher, and not always attention capturing. I have tried to do this before at various points in my life, and never succeeded.

I know that I need to however. I am so excited to use this opportunity to grow in my relationship with Jesus, and to better understand my faith! I also know that the support of the others in my group reading alongside me will inspire me to stick with it. The Bible we will be using has also been especially designed for the Bible in 90 Days program, and I think that will help as well...only 12 pages a day, with minimal foot notes to distract from the reading. I can just feel God asking me to do this, and to spend this time with Him.

I'd love to have you join me! If you would like to participate, click over to here and sign up. It's quick and easy, and provides lots of information to help you get started. Tell me if you decide to join, and we can support each other!!

A Day in the Life 6/11/10 at OneTrueMedia.com

2010-06-12T09:50:00.001-05:00

My friend Christi did this about a year ago..and I love her great idea! I decided to try this out myself. Our day yesterday...

Make an on-line slideshow at www.OneTrueMedia.com

The Micek House at OneTrueMedia.com

2010-06-11T22:17:00.002-05:00

Getting sad to say good bye to this place...

Make an on-line slideshow at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Home Made Laundry Soap Tutorial

2010-06-08T21:15:00.004-05:00

I love to buy things in bulk when I can at Costco. It saves our family LOTS of money each month. By far our biggest expense at Costco was laundry soap. With four very dirty boys, we spent about $30 per month just on laundry detergent.

I started researching alternatives on the internet after I saw Michele Duggar on an episode of "19 Kids and Counting" making her own laundry soap. I was impressed to find that after making my own soap, I could do a load of laundry for about 3 cents a load, giving us a lot of savings!

It ended up being VERY easy to do. The whole process took me about 20 minutes. I have also been extremely impressed with how well it gets out stains. When I have tried other natural laundry detergents, I have been very disappointed with their stain fighting qualities, especially with wash cloths (did I mention dirty boys?!) and food stains.

The Recipe
This is a low sudsing soap, so it can be used in HE machines as well as regular washing machines. You will not see bubbles in the water, but that's okay! It's the ingredients that clean, not the bubbles!

1/3 bar of Fels Naptha soap
1/2 cup of 20 Mule Team Borax
1/2 cup of Arm & Hammer Washing Soda (this is NOT baking soda!)
Sweet Orange Essential Oil (optional, if you would like to add a little scent to your soap)
***Note: with the exception of the Essential Oil, these items should be available in the laundry aisle of your local super market. I chose to start with a starter kit from Lehmans.com, because it came with a grater, and a great 4 gallon bucket to store the detergent in.

First, grate your 1/3 bar of Fels Naptha soap using a vegetable grater.

Next, put the grated soap into a pan. Add 6 cups of water, and heat over medium heat until the soap melts. Stir constantly, and do not let the water come to a boil.

Add the washing soda and the borax to the melted soap. Stir until all is dissolved, and then remove from the heat. Be sure to use washing soda, not baking soda. Baking soda will not work. I also chose to add 3/4 cup of the borax, for an extra stain fighting boost.

Pour 4 cups of HOT water into a 4 gallon bucket (the bucket should have a lid). Add the soap mixture and stir well, then add 1 gallon plus 6 cups of water and stir again. After the mixture has cooled down, put the lid on the bucket and let it sit overnight.

The soap should turn into a gel overnight. It will look more like an "egg soup" consistency, rather than a traditional gel. At this point you can add essential oil if you would like your soap to be scented. I like Sweet Orange. I used 25 drops for this recipe.

One Batch of Soap will make approximately 2 gallons. Use 1/2 cup per load. The soap should be stirred or shaken before each use. I saved and rinsed out a used liquid detergent bottle, and I fill this up with soap from my bucket as needed. The bottle can easily be shaken before each use, and the cap is exactly a 1/2 cup, so it works perfectly. The recipe can be doubled if you would like, or your family uses a lot of laundry soap per month.

Happy Soap Making!!

My Parent's Real Estate Nightmare

2010-06-06T14:07:00.003-05:00

My parents own a multi level house. It was a great place to raise 4 kids, and it gave us lots of space to be together while also providing room for private quiet time. Now that my parents are nearing retirement age, they knew it was time to move on. Carrying laundry up from the basement and up three flights of stairs isn't easy for my Mom anymore, and we knew it wasn't the place they could spend their retirement.

In February, they started hunting for their new house. My dad asked me to help, and I went to probably 25 different houses with them. During the whole thing, we learned one thing. My Mom loves ranches. She loves smaller but beautiful spaces, and doesn't want a lot to have to clean and take care of. My Dad is the polar opposite. He hates ranches and likes an upper floor, with lots of space and a big basement.

It was looking like these differences in opinion was going to make it impossible for them to agree on anything. But that changed on Holy Saturday, April 3rd. On a whim, they went through a 1 1/2 story. It was love at first sight for both of them. Main floor laundry and master suite for my Mom, and an upper floor with huge basement for my Dad. I loved it too, and even more so, I loved we had FINALLY found the house after 6 weeks of looking. It really was their dream house. They put an offer in that day, and put their house on the market the next week.

My Dad then spent 6 long weeks biting his nails and waiting for their current house to sell. The housing market in Omaha, like much of the country, is not good. It was a hard wait, and Mom and Dad began steeling themselves for the probability that the house wouldn't sell, and that they would be staying put.

Last Sunday, they finally got an offer on their house. My parents were ecstatic and spent the next three days making happy plans. On Tuesday afternoon everything took a turn for the worse when the sellers of the house they were buying backed out, despite a signed contract. It meant that my parents were going to loose about $7500 when you combine the money they spent on the inspection and appraisal, and the home tax credit they would now be loosing. After a day spent Wednesday trying to coerce the sellers into honoring their legal agreement, my Dad decided that they would sue the lady for damages, (his real estate agent is suing her for his loss of commission) and try to find a new house. The buyers of their house agreed to wait until Friday afternoon for a final answer from my parents, which left us with Thursday evening and Friday morning to find a new house.

I knew it would be hard because my Dad had been so in love with the first house. I knew it would be hard too, because of the time crunch and the low availability of houses on the market. Even harder? My Dad couldn't get the day off of work on Friday, which left my Mom and me to make a quick decision on our own.

We found a house that was pretty good Friday morning. It had some of the features my Mom liked, and some that my Dad liked. It was by far the best choice of the houses we had seen over the last two days. When we called my Dad to tell him about it though, I told him he would be okay with it, but he wouldn't love it. He told my Mom to go ahead and buy it. So we did.

It's new construction, so that's really nice. The problem is that it is a ranch, and it is smaller than my Dad wanted. I knew it would make my Mom super happy, and my Dad wouldn't be crazy about it, but we only had 5 hours to find a place to move, or loose their only offer on their house. A horrible decision to make.

After the paper signing, my Mom was happy. She likes the house and the location. When my Dad saw it that night, he was depressed. He doesn't like the location, and he doesn't like the layout.

Me? I haven't been able to sleep since. If there is anyone in my life that I need to have respect and approval from, it is my Dad. He is one of the most important people in my life, and I always want to be able to have his approval. It makes me sick that he might think I made a bad choice for him. Maybe he sent me to balance out my Mom, since I knew what he liked and didn't like. If we had had more time, I would not have picked this house for him, but under the circumstances, I didn't know what else to do.

Dad is out of town this week, so the worst part is I haven't even gotten to talk to him about it. Looks like I am not going to be sleeping for awhile.

Charlie is a Soccer Star

2010-06-02T20:54:00.004-05:00

This spring provided Charlie with his first team sports experience. He played micro soccer for Gretna Soccer. It was a much better experience than we had with the YMCA soccer teams, and we are excited to have both Charlie and Sammy involved in the fall season.

Isn't he adorable? The hard thing about the whole experience was that our family's true sports fanatic, Sammy, was too young to play and had to watch the action. I bought him a pair of cleats so he could feel special too, and he kicked around a ball on an empty field near the game. He is beyond excited to join Charlie in August.

Charlie had good games and bad games, and one time got hit in the stomach so hard with a ball that he passed out, but all in all, he is loving the game of soccer, and I am loving that I am back to being a soccer mom.

A Date With Dad

2010-05-22T09:01:00.002-05:00

When I was in high school, every couple of weeks or so my Dad would take me out for a "Coke Date". Nothing fancy...we would just go to a nearby restaurant and order cokes, maybe some onion rings, and just talk. Just us together. When I was navigating the rocky waters of being a teenage girl (TORTURE I tell you-to be a teenage girl) this was one of the things that kept me grounded. They will always be one of my best memories of my Dad, who is truly one of the best guys I know.

Nowadays, we don't get to have our Coke dates, but whenever I get to have some Daddy/Daughter time with Dad, and it is just us, I love it. A couple of weeks ago, I got the chance to do just that.

Do you know the amazing Garrison Keillor? I grew up listening to his radio show and TV show "A Prairie Home Companion" with my parents. I love his storytelling, but I also love his voice. It is like warm honey, and OH so relaxing. When I was in labor with Evan, I listened to his voice telling calming stories to relax me through each contraction. When I was ready to give in to an anxiety attack after Sam was born, I walked around with my Garrison's voice coming through my iPod to help soothe my nerves. Right before Easter, I discovered that Garrison would be coming to Omaha, and that I might have the chance to see him in person! I immediately grabbed up two tickets, and then invited my Dad to join me.

It was a great evening. It was my first time to visit the Holland Performing Arts center in downtown Omaha, and it was beautiful. Seeing Garrison in person, hearing that honey smooth voice in person was amazing. But spending an evening with my Dad? That? Was priceless.

Our New Church Home

2010-05-19T21:19:00.004-05:00

We have an exciting event happening right now in our church family! When we moved to our house 4 years ago, we joined a brand new parish called St. Charles Borromeo. Our neighborhood is located in the very western edge of Omaha, in an area that is still surrounded by farm fields and country roads. It is a quickly developing area that was in need of a new church. We spent 4 long years in the gym of a public elementary school while funds were raised for a new church building.

The church finally broke ground in October, and just 6 short months later, we are ready for our very first services this weekend! Last Sunday we went to an Open House. We were wowed to find all of this...

Beautiful stained glass behind the altar...the window is from another church that closed, and is over 100 years old

View of the altar

Stations of the Cross, also from the closed parish, also over 100 years old. Beautiful!

We are just so excited to be in a normal worship space! Sammy has been in a "gym church" all of his life, and when we go to services at other churches, he always asks me where the basketball hoops are! It is a going to be an adjustment for the kids, but a good one!

We can't wait for services this weekend!

On Why I Took a Blogging Break...

2010-05-15T22:13:00.003-05:00

Right after Sam was born, and I was the mother of a newborn, a 10 month old, and a 7 year old, life was completely overwhelming. I went into survival mode, and got through every day by praying, counting to 10 to keep my patience countless times a day, praying again, and by telling myself that in a few short years when they boys were older it would be easier.

But...
it's not.

Some things are better. I am not feeding two infants bottles all day long, or changing diapers, or chasing after newly mobile toddlers. But these things have all been replaced by different difficulties. Like grumpy pre-teens, soccer and swimming lessons, eye therapy, helping a son with a major learning disability to tackle the intermediate grades, and temper tantrums. Add on a house that never stays clean for more than 5 seconds and a full time job, and I am wiped out all the time.

I originally came to the internet and blogging as a way to work through some of the stress of these things. It was a great release for me. But then I found that I was turning to it all the time, and putting off jobs around the house, or worse yet, spending more time with my laptop after school than my kids.

Between having less time down time due to the kids, and trying to detox from my internet fixation, my blog started to wither.

And I miss it! I miss having that record of what is going on in my kids lives. You think you will always remember the big moments without writing them down, but you don't. Recently I was filling out some paperwork for an evaluation that Evan is going to have done, and it asked things like when he started walking, talking, rolling over, and dressing himself. I knew a couple of them, but I found myself really having to ponder others. Which makes me so sad. I don't want to loose those tiny details, and I know I will if I don't record them.

I am going to do my best to get back here, both for myself and my kids. And what better time than the start of summer. Hopefully lots of lazy summer days are ahead of us.

Girlfriends

2010-03-02T20:15:00.003-06:00

One thing I have noticed in my 5 years of being married to a tax accountant, is that when one spouse has a job that requires them to work a lot of hours, the person that is left taking care of the family is left with precious little time to do things like nurture friendships. Instead, things like feeding and bathing the children, and laundry take precedence. Because I was a single mother for about 5 years before I got married and was yet again the sole person in charge of a household, my friendships with girlfriends have suffered sorely. I miss being in the company of a group of girls down to my very bones. Not having a "tribe" leaves me feeling adrift and lonely.

Last night I had a lovely little break from this whole conundrum. One of the other girls at school, who also happens to be one of my favorite people, invited some girls from school over to watch The Bachelor finale (I am obsessed with this show, which is a whole other post!) It has been years...literally years....since I have had a fun night out with a big group of girls. And oh! It was HEAVEN. I am so thankful that Jeff sacrificed and came home really early last night so that I could get out for a bit. Being able to laugh, talk, and laugh some more with a group of people who just "get" you is a gift.

I need, as much as I need to eat and breath, to do this on a more regular basis. I am not sure how to get it done, but I have to make friendships a priority.

And could you believe that Bachelor Jake?!! What was he thinking when he picked Vienna? An amazing ending to a great season! Looking forward to seeing Jake on Dancing With the Stars!

Back Again

2010-02-26T07:00:00.001-06:00

My poor, poor blog. I got it all prettied up, and then I neglected it for two weeks.

I am going to clear out the cobwebs around here, spruce things up, and give you an update.
And, I am going to try and make it here more regularly. Hopefully life slows down a bit so I can.

My dad is doing so much better. He actually went back to work on Wednesday for the first time in 3 weeks. It feels good to have him in a regular routine, and to have him looking like his normal healthy self.

It's still tax season, and that blows. We are all getting worn out. Jeff has had two different viral infections, and now a sinus infection. I think it's because he works WAAAAAY too much. The boys miss their dad terribly, and I am beyond tired by the time 8:00 rolls around.

My poor Evan. He was soooooooooo close to graduating from eye therapy, and his therapist up and quit last week, with no notice. They do not have another therapist who has an opening and enough experience to work with an eye problem as severe as Evan's is, so we aren't sure what to do next. We are on a waiting list right now, but this has already gone on for 15 months, 5 months longer than they originally told us it would take. The older he gets, the harder it is to miss school for this as well. Jeff and I are thinking it might be a sign we need to be done. I feel bad for Evan though who has given this his all, only to have the adult in charge quit on him.

Charlie is going to be starting soccer this month. He is super excited, especially because his cousins Brooke and Colin are going to be on his team. Sammy is disgusted he isn't old enough to play. It will be a rough season for him.

Most exciting is that I am going to be an aunt again on March 19th. I can't wait to have a baby around to squish again. I love babies. SO. MUCH. Can't wait to meet this one!

Hope you all have a great weekend ahead. I can't wait for March next week! I am SO ready for spring!!

Dad

2010-02-07T09:37:00.002-06:00

I was able to spend most of the day yesterday with my Dad at the hospital. It was nice to be able to send my Mom home for a little bit to rest, run some errands, and take a shower. She seemed to be more relaxed and refreshed when she returned, which was a relief. She has been at my Dad's side since everything happened, and I worry about the toll this is taking on her as well.

Dad was better, but not better, all at the same time. The bleeding has stopped, and the pain is reduced, which is wonderful. We are thankful for small victories. On the other hand, he has so much blood from the hemorrhage in his abdomen it looks like he is 5 months pregnant. The pressure this extra fluid is putting on his organs makes it hard for him to eat and drink more than a small amount, and to take a full breath. He is off the narcotic pain relief which has eased his nausea, but that leaves him with substantial pain when shifting or walking.

Yesterday he was allowed to walk from the bed to the bathroom, and it was amazing how much this small task exhausted him. I think that is what really hit me yesterday...how tired he is, and how weak he is. He would drop off to sleep in the middle of a sentence, and the smallest of movements would take his breath away. He looks so much older than he did a few days ago, and that is hard to see.

It's going to be a long recovery process, longer than I originally thought. We expect him to be in the hospital until at least Monday or Tuesday, and to be off of work for much longer than that. This adds a whole new layer of stress to the situation, as both of my parents are away from work for an extended period.

I want to say thank you to each of you who have said a prayer for him. The very best part of the internet is the friendships and communities it creates, and I am so thankful for real life and blogging friends this week. My family and I have felt so supported and loved, and I can't thank each of you enough. I will be praying that each of you and your families have a wonderful week ahead.

Company Girl Coffee 2-5

2010-02-05T07:00:00.000-06:00

I don't even know where to start with this post. I have been running on adrenalin for the past two days, and now I am tired and weepy.

My Dad went in for a surgical procedure on his heart on Wednesday morning. It was a procedure he has had twice before, and was supposed to be fairly routine. However, during the surgery, the femoral artery in his groin tore as they were trying to thread a line up to his heart. He began to bleed internally pretty heavily. When all was said and done, he lost about 6-7 pints of blood, which ended up in his abdomen and behind his organs. Initially, they had trouble stopping the bleeding, and getting him stabilized, which was beyond nerve wracking. My siblings, mother, and I spent most of the day Wednesday at the hospital waiting and hoping and praying while they worked to stop the bleeding and stabilize him.

He had several blood transfusions to help replace what was lost and bring up his hemoglobin levels. Today he was in pretty severe pain with the fluid and blood in his gut putting pressure on his lungs and organs, so they are giving him some pretty heavy duty pain killers. He was allowed to sit up a little today, but it will be awhile before they let him out of bed to try standing or walking.

The whole situation was so surreal. It was scary and made me feel so helpless. During the worst of it, the thought I kept coming back to was that I absolutely can't imagine my life without my dad in it. He is truly larger than life, and is the best man I know. He has a wicked sense of humor, a love of children and animals, and is the handiest man around the house. Best of all, he is a connector of people. He has a magic talent for working with others, and bringing out the best in everyone he meets. He finds ways to nurture friendships between people who might not otherwise be together. He is the core of our family and the core of our lives. Without him to anchor me, I feel like I would float, aimlessly.

I am just so incredibly thankful he is getting better. I am so thankful for everyone who has cared for my family this week. My dad has been uplifted through prayer and love, and it has helped us to feel much comfort.

I am hoping and praying that this weekend brings quick healing and pain relief for my dad, and some rest for my Mom, who has been through the wringer. I know I asked for a prayer last week as well from all of you Company Girls, but if you could spare time for one more, I would love you for it. Prayer is AMAZING, and it is what is getting us through.

Angst

2010-02-02T21:03:00.003-06:00

Conversations with Evan lately take one of two directions.

Conversation One
Me: Evan can you please _____. (Insert household chore here).
Evan: What?! I can't believe you are making me dooooooooo that! You are the meeeeaaaaaanest Mom the whole wooooooooooorld! You just don't understaaaand me!

Conversation Two
Me: Evan can you please ______.
Evan: I can't do anything right! I'm the worst kid ever!
Me: Evan, PLEASE do not talk about yourself that way!
Evan: But I can't even take out the trash right, so I'm not going to.

Ugh. It hurts my heart, to suddenly be constantly at odds with my sweet little boy. We used to be so connected, and so in tune with each other. I hate that we have to go through this stupid teenage angst. And that it started at 11. Don't we have at least two more years to go before the hormones?

I remember having these conversations with my Mom. I remember being a complete, annoying wreck when I was anywhere from 13-20. But, for the life of me, I can't remember why. Why in the world did I feel that way? Why did the world seem out to get me? In particular my parents? I feel like if I could just recapture some of that, maybe I could make this easier on Evan and I.

But maybe too, everyone has to go through this. I just hate it. I want my kid back. I want my relationship with my kid back.

And I wish I could take back every single rotten thing I ever said to my mother as a kid. I get it now, what it did to her, and how it made her feel.

Ugh.

New Perspective

2010-01-30T21:26:00.004-06:00

This afternoon, I was busy cursing winter under my breath. Saturday brings me the despicable task of sweeping all the floors and mopping everything clean again. Doing this in the month of January means that I sweep an entire sandbox full of rocks into my dustpan. Despite being "Mom the Shoe Nazi" (as Evan calls me) and freaking out at my family if they try to wear their shoes more than 2 feet beyond the garage door, the sand and gravel and rock salt are invading my house.

I was also cursing because I would dearly love to shoo my boys outside for the afternoon. Today though, it was chilly, muddy, and icy all at once, and hello? I don't want to add mud and snow to the mess on the floor.

So I was grouching and grumping as I stepped onto my back deck to shake out some rugs when I must have been hit in the head with a brick or something, because all of sudden I was struck with the simple beauty of a winter afternoon.

The farm fields behind our house were dusted with snow, and looked like a baker had sprinkled them with powdered sugar. The air had just the perfect amount of bite to it, so that instead of making it hard to breathe, it awakened your senses. The sun had just started to sink lower in the sky, and the light was so golden...rich. And I was dazzled. Invigorated.

I'm not giving up my pining for spring. I still can't wait to mow the grass and throw open the windows to warm spring breezes. But I am glad to have had this reminder that beauty comes in all seasons.

Company Girl Coffee

2010-01-29T08:00:00.000-06:00

Today I am thinking of an old friend who is having a difficult week. She is the mother of one of my best friends, and also the mother of my first boyfriend. She played a HUGE role in my teenage years, and was like an extra mother to me. As an adult, she has become a trusted friend.

In November, my friend was diagnosed with breast cancer. After two surgeries in December, this month she started chemotherapy and radiation treatments. This week, her hair began to fall out. Last night, her husband shaved off the last of her hair for her.

I remember when my own Mom had to go through this same step. My Mom was diagnosed with breast cancer in June of 2002. The surgeries were hard physically and emotionally, the chemo made her miserable, but one of the hardest steps was loosing her hair. When it was reduced to clumps here and there, she asked my Dad to shave the rest off for her. As women, we identify so much of our look and personality through our hair. To suddenly be stripped of this is shocking. My mother described it feeling as though she had to walk in public naked.

I was at my parents home when my dad shaved her hair, and it is a moment I will never forget. The tenderness between my parents. My mother's bravery. My mom asking a 3 1/2 year old Evan to hold her hand while her hair fell down around her. Evan standing next to her, holding her hand and patting her shoulder. All of it is etched into a forever memory. When it was all done, Evan looked at her and said, "Wow! That looks cool! Now you are my circle head Grandma!" We all laughed, and it was that child like humor that saved the moment.

And so, as my friend also goes through this experience this week, I am praying for her. I am praying that she is blessed with health, comfort, and peace. But most of all, I pray that she receives strength to get through the tougher moments.

If you could spare a second, please pray for her. The power of prayer is amazing! I know it will help immeasurably.

Kitty Cat Hats

2010-01-27T20:14:00.003-06:00

A couple of weeks ago, on cjane enjoy it, Courtney showed a picture of her adorable son The Chief wearing a handmade knitted kitty cat hat. Modeled by as cute a chubby cheeked youngster as The Chief, the hats were irresistible. I loved the cat ears on the top, and I knew Charlie and Sammy would too. Courtney mentioned the hats were made by a talented reader of her blog, Amy, who has a business called Something to Meow About.

I emailed Amy right away to ask if she would make a Kitty Cat Hat for Charlie and Sammy. Look what came in the mail today:

I love, love, LOVE these hats. They are gorgeous, and the attention to detail is amazing! The boys love them so much they spent the rest of the day wearing them and pretending they were kitties.

You too can have one of these scrumptious creations! Just email Amy at: ladyamybug@yahoo.com

Thank you Amy!!

Worried...

2010-01-26T21:28:00.003-06:00

I am worried about Evan.

Evan was identified in Kindergarten with a reading disability. Immediately after hearing the news, I was of course concerned, but I also felt that we had an immense amount of time to help him catch up.

Then I blinked, and I was married with two babies. My time after work shrank considerably.

Then I blinked again, and now Evan is suddenly in 5th grade. And that immense amount of time has disappeared.

He makes progress every year, but slow progress. This year after testing we discovered he is two years behind his peers in reading development. Sitting in the meeting, hearing he reads at the level of a 3rd grader, I wanted to vomit. We have had him tutored, he is in special ed classes at school, and we have been doing eye therapy for over a year now, all in an effort to help him become a better reader. And still. So far behind.

As Evan grows up, and begins to look more grown up and act more grown up, I begin to envision his future. How will he ever get through high school like this? Will a private high school even accept him? What about college? You can't go to college if you can't read. How will he support himself? My mother's heart spirals into a cycle of worry when I think about it.

I have tried about every thing I can think of to help him. The only other thing I can think of is having him sit next to Charlie this spring and summer as I teach Charlie to read. Would it help to start from the beginning? The older Evan gets, the harder it is to make him work on these beginning reading tasks, because it makes him feel humiliated.

Panic is starting to set in. I don't know what else to do to help him.

Sucess!

2010-01-25T08:30:00.000-06:00

I have been working along with Rachel Ann at Home Sanctuary to accomplish one of my New Year's goals. I wanted creating Sanctuary for my family to be a major focus for me this year. Luckily for me, one of the first tasks Rachel Ann assigned was to take a close look at our weekly schedule, and then to use that to create a weekly Housekeeping Schedule.

This was so helpful. In the summer, when I am off work, it is SO much easier to get everyday chores done. When I am working full time, it's another story. Setting a schedule and involving my family was a great idea. We divided up tasks based on our schedule of weekly activities, and both Evan and Jeff agreed to be assigned regular jobs.

This was my first whole week of following with the schedule and sticking to it. And it ROCKED. My laundry was done ahead of schedule today. My house is clean. I even had time for a couple of organizing projects around the house. I completely cleared off the fridge and reorganized it today. When Charlie came through the room when I was done, he asked, "Hey, who got us a new fridge Mom?" Wow. That little comment showed me just how badly this needed to be done!

And now, I even have some me time at the end of the day! A perfect way to end a Sunday. Thanks Rachel Ann, for such a great idea.

Attitude Adjustment

2010-01-24T12:30:00.000-06:00

I am in need of a serious attitude adjustment.

Tax season is always a struggle for me as a wife. Intellectually, I know this is a time when I can really step up to the plate and show Jeff my love and support. I should be doing my best to make our home a place of sanctuary, to take care of the kids, and to offer him a positive shoulder to lean on when he is tired from working long hours.

Emotionally though, all I can seem to do lately is pity myself. I think grumpy thoughts about having to work a full time job, always be in charge of the house and the kids, and on and on. I find my brain running through this litany of complaints over and over again as I go through my daily tasks and by the time Jeff comes home I am like Mount Vesuvias. Poor guy. He just wants a warm meal and a friendly face, and instead he comes home to me. Grouchy Selfish Wife.

I need to keep joy front and center in my attitude. I am lucky to be wife to this man who works so hard to support us. I am lucky to have three beautiful boys to care for, and a home to call our own. I know these things. I know I need to be joyful. But how?

I so wish I was better at looking outside of myself and focusing on others. I wish I was better at being a joyful mother and wife. It's the best thing for my family. I am going to start by praying for Jeff, and my kids. I find it is a lot harder to be mad at someone you are praying intently for. You'll be able to find me in the next few weeks cleaning the bathrooms and fervently muttering prayers at the same time.

Here's hoping I can turn myself around. My family deserves it.

Blog Love

2010-01-23T08:44:00.003-06:00

Look! It's here!! My blog just had a beautiful make over.

Emily over at The Blog Fairy did an amazing job. She was so easy to work with, she was fast, and she knew exactly what I wanted, just by me answering a few questions in an email.

Seriously. I could just sit here and stare at it all day long!! (Which would be bad...as I may have about 20 loads of laundry waiting for me.)

Thanks Emily for making The Sole Woman beautiful!

Company Girl Coffee: January 22

2010-01-22T20:25:00.004-06:00

WOW am I late getting around to this post this week! It's so late that maybe I should offer you a glass of wine instead of coffee. How 'bout it? Maybe some appetizers too...boy that sounds yummy.

The Big News around The Sole Woman this week is that I am getting a visit from The Blog Fairy!!! I have really loved the look of my blog, but it has been almost two years since the last redo, and I felt like it was time for a change. So check back soon! I'm getting some new diggs around here, and I am in love with the work Emily at The Blog Fairy did. She is an excellent designer!

I am also really excited because we recently booked a vacation for our family this summer. It will be the first time in two years that we have taken a trip as a family. We've been working so hard to replenish our savings after the whole two babies-a new house-and a minivan-in one year debacle of 2006. Now that Mr. Sole Woman is feeling more confident of the finances, we are going to get to have some family relaxation time! It will also be a little celebration of our 5 year anniversary.

We will be visiting Pine Beach Resort in northern Minnesota. This will be our third trip to the resort. We stay in a cabin right on the beach at Lake Belle Taine. It is so amazing to wake up to the sound of water lapping at the shore, grab a cup of coffee, and drink it on the deck over looking the water while a magnificent sunrise dazzles the senses. Charlie was only 6 months old the last time we went, and Sam has never been, so I can't wait to see what the little boys think. Now, if only July were a little closer!!!

I hope all of you have had a great week, and have an even better weekend!